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Delirious

Delirious

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Title: With Nothing Left To Lose-
Author: Me
E-mail: destinyrebel@hotmail.com
Disclaimer: Roswell belongs to Jason Katims, UPN and 20th Century Fox. Sorry, if I forgot anyone. Anyway, I'm just borrowing everything. You know, for my own selfish reasons…
Category: Liz's POV. AU- to some extent. M/L + CC.
Rating: PG-13 right now but I do include a couple of cuss words.
Summary: Well, I just started writing this so I don't really know. Um, Michael and Tess saved Liz, Alex, Maria and Kyle from a robbery at the Crashdown one day, so they know about the alienness thing. Max and Isabel don't live in Roswell so the humans have never met them personally. But they do know about them. Everything else will just unfold as it unfolds...

Author's note: Ok, this is my first POV fic, so I hope I'm not screwing anything up. If I am, please let me know! ;p
Anyway, I have a couple parts of this already finished, so let me know if you like it and I'll get them up ASAP. Thanks so much and I hope you enjoy...*

With Nothing Left To Lose.
Part 1-

I can't sing.

I try but I almost always fail. I don't know why though. It just seems to be some kind of freak little detail that's included in my life and it has never decided to go away or fix itself...

But like every other person in this sad world, I do sing along with almost every song that comes on the radio, with one little exception of course. I have to be the only one in the room.

Naturally, I'm not going to subject myself to levels of embarrassment that would come along with belting out some bubble-gum pop hit in front of actually people. Right?

~

It's almost 11:25 pm on a very miserable Friday night. Michael Guerin and I have clean up duty at my families Café, The Crashdown, cause my dad, the incomparable Jeff Parker, decided to take my mom, Nancy, to Albuquerque, NM for some weird three day weekend.

Why, you ask? I have no idea. But I did protest. God, did I protest… But in the end, it didn't work...

Anyway, so I've got the milkshake machine pretty much disassembled in front of me. Who the hell cleaned this last time? I need to ask cause there is this build-up of dried flaky stuff everywhere and in-between. Eww...

“Michael, were you supposed to clean this thing last time?” I call out, mostly cause I'm not a person who really loves silence. So, bickering with Michael seems better then nothing.

Sad, I know...

“What? Clean what, when?” He called back.

Great job, Michael. Play dumb. That will get you places once you get out of this hell hole labeled Roswell.

“The milkshake machine thing! It's really sick in there!” I reply, referring to the dried flaky stuff again.

“I don't know. I usually get out of it...”

“Wonderful, Michael. Just wonderful…” I mutter. “Hey, can't we find a way to use alien powers or something to fix it?” I asked hopefully as a strange shudder descends my spine, I think the smell is going to make me sick. Once again, eww...

“Yeah, that will work.” He laughs. He is actually laughing at me. I can't have that. So, what do I do? Exactly. I go for the radio.

Oh, and I know I said I wouldn't sing with people in the room. Well, I won't. Technically, Michael is in the kitchen. Ha! See my wonderful logic?

Ok. Frankly, I don't care if Mikey G hears my sing. Cause I have heard him try to sing his own rendition of Metallica a couple times, so I think we are just about even.

“What station you want?” I smile sweetly. I know this will piss him off. And I don't know why I want to piss him off right now but I do. And I will. It's pretty simple.

“Liz…” He groans.

“Woohoo! KROZ it is!”

“Oh my god… It's all @#%$ on that station.” He groans again.

“I know... But I want to listen to something while I finish up this disgusting mess.” I try to explain my good intentions.

“Yeah, right.”

“Ahh… You don't believe me?”

“No, I don't. But whatever... I am going to go upstairs and get cleaned up. Ok?” He asked, while poking his head through the little order window.

“Uh huh...” I answer absent mindedly.

“Good.”

And then he is gone. And I am alone to sing.

Yay, for me!

I quickly adjust the volume and go back to the pile of metal and dried flaky stuff. Maybe I could just throw it in the washer. Or maybe I could call Maria, she would know what to do. Or maybe I really could use alien powers...

Unfortunately, I know none of those ideas will pan out so I just dive right in. I grab the drip pan first. Cause starting small is a good idea in a situation like this.

Rinse. Scrub. Rinse. I do this about three times before I lose track. Michael hasn't been down since he went up, so I am left to imagine he went home. Lucky bastard...

Rinse. Scrub. Rinse. It's about 11:55 now. I am tired. This is not how a senior in high school should spend one of there precious Friday nights. Damn it... How did I get roped into this, again?

Rinse. Scrub. Rinse. Ok, I am not even thinking anymore. Rinse, scrub, rinse, is just about the only thing I can focus on. My brain hurts...

But wait. I know this song. It's one I love and one that holds a lot of good memories.

Twelve months ago, one of my best friends, Alex Whitman, surprised Maria Deluca, another one of my best friends, and I with tickets to a concert. I was ecstatic. We had fun. We got to act like teenagers for a couple of hours. It was great.

Because you see, before we found out about Michael and Tess Harding, we were able to do things like that all the time. Every weekend, the three of us would make an effort to do things that were deemed “cool”.

But after the robbery attempt and after Michael and Tess had to tell us their true origins, things changed. It now seemed that every weekend, Michael, Tess, Alex, Maria, Kyle Valenti, and I were battling evil aliens or covering something up, or even uncovering something new and significant.

The six of us were bound by a secret. And we were all destined to help each other.

Kind of...

Anyway, this song was one that always seemed to make sense to me, even though it didn't too many others. So, I close my eyes and I start singing and smiling as I remembered the last night my friends and I got to be carefree...

“Snow is falling from the sky - In the middle of July.
Sun was shining in my eyes again last night.
Alarm goes off without a sound - the silence is so loud - something isn't right.

Footsteps echo down the hall - no one's there at all.
Dial your number but your voice says "I'm not home".
Everything is inside out - I don't know what it's about.

It keeps getting stranger by the day…”

But as the chorus continues, I don't. Because in mid-twirl I realize that someone has walked into the Café and that person is just standing there, watching me. And amazing, only three words come to mind and I totally don't care that he heard me sing.

The prize words are: Oh @#%$ @#%$...

But of course I can't say that out loud. I am Liz Parker. I don't cuss and I rarely ever curse.

So, after a good thirty seconds of staring at him, I scream. I scream with all the lung power I can muster. And I keep screaming. And I don't think about how this guy could just be some customer that wanted a midnight snack or how he could just be passing through town and by some mistake he missed an exit or something. Because knowing real live aliens has taught me a few things. And I felt the need to scream, so I screamed.

And while I screamed, his eyes just grew so wide. I don't know for sure but I can almost guarantee that I freaked the hell out of him. He was just frozen in place as the color quickly drained from his face.

Ok, now I starting to think that maybe screaming at the top of my lungs wasn't such a bright idea but I still continue to do it. And I don't stop until I hear Michael screaming back and I see him stumble through the kitchen doors with his hand raised.

“LIZ?! Liz, what's wrong?! LIZ?!”

“Wait!” The guy shouted immediately, while backing up.

And I swear to god, I saw him start to raise his hand.

So, what do I do?

I grab the closest thing I can get my hands on and chuck it at him.

Well, the plastic soda glass missed his head by about two inches and I earned more shouts from both Michael and the guy.

Michael tells me to wait and the guy tells me to stop. So, I shout back. “Damn it... What the hell? Michael, @#%$ blast him or something!” Oops. I cursed and cussed. Oh well...

“No! Wait, Liz!” Michael calls again.

“No, Michael. He was going to use his hand! Do something!” I scream and stumble over my words. Why the hell is Michael not blasting him? Michael never thinks first. What's wrong?

But I don't think I have time to contemplate the situation, so I go for another glass.

“No, wait!” The stranger pleads. “I think I am one of the good guys...”

“Michael?” I ask as I get ready to throw lucky number two. Maybe this time I can get it within one inch of his head...

“Liz, put it down.” Michael gently tells me. “It's okay.”

“Michael?” I ask again. “I think I need some kind of reassurance here! Cause from my stand point this guy could really easily kill us both here and now!”

“Liz, remember when I told you an old friend was going to come and visit?” Michael cautiously asks.

“No.” I tell him in a shaky and uncertain voice. Because that's what I do when I lie. I end up using this shaky, hesitant, breathy voice. It's actually really embarrassing. Anyway...

“Liz?” He questions. Damn it... He knows. He so knows I know.

“Oh my god...” I mutter as I drop the second glass on the floor.

And without skipping a beat, only one thought pops into my head. And no, it's not that a friend of Michael's heard me sing.

Amazing, the only thing going through my mind is, the fact that I threw a dirty cup at a king's head. Once again, Oh @#%$ @#%$...

“Um... Liz? Meet Max, Max Evans...” Michael coughed as I turned bright red with embarrassment...

TBC….?


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# 2 
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I love it! Keep posting! Liz threw a cup at the head of the alien king! Too funny :lol :lol :rollin2 "lol
C.


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# 3 
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destinyrebel~ I can't wait to read this! However, I've been a bit busy the last few days.. :lol Thanks so much for posting it, and I will get to it first thing after Easter! :grin :grin :grin


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# 4 

Delirious

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*Thanks, guys, for the FB! And I hope you like this one...*

With Nothing Left To Lose.
Part 2-

Do you ever have those moments where all you can do is just hold your breath and wish that it isn't just a dream that you will wake up from?

Do you ever have those moments where all you can do is just hold your breath and wish with all your might that it is just a dream that you will wake up from? If only because you can't even begin to comprehend the amount of humiliation that you will be faced with, if it actually happened in your real reality.

Yeah. Me too...

~

“So...” Michael began awkwardly.

Smooth Mikey. But truthfully, I can't say I am doing any better. Cause believe it or not, I'm still standing in the same spot, the same things are still running through my head, and I am still bright, freaking red...

Yeah so, Go me!

“Yeah...” The guy, excuse me, Max Evans, replies as he shoves his hands into his front pockets.

Wow. He's nervous. La de freakin' da...

Strangely, I don't know if anyone really knows this about me or not but I don't do well in awkward social situations. I think I got it from my mom's side but she flat out denies it... I know better. It's all her fault...

I swear.

Anyway, I need to find a way out; I need a way to “excuse” myself from this “ awkward social situation”. But how? What can I do that won't make me look like an even bigger idiot? Damn it...

Once again, I really wish Maria was here. She would defiantly know what to do. Maybe if I just think like her... What would Maria Deluca do?

Think. Think. Think.

Wait. I don't think Maria would think that much...

Ahh crap...

Ok. There has to be a way out, right? I've found ways out before. 17 years of escaping this very kind of situation should have taught me a couple things.

But I guess the keywords there are should have.

Damn it...

Ok. Here's goes something...

“Wait, did you guys hear that?” I end up squeaking out, quickly. Cause I think I now have a plan...

“No. What did you hear?” Michael asked as if he was almost grateful for the interruption.

“Um… I think it was the phone.” I reply lamely with a sigh. Cause I am now realizing that there is no way in hell this is going to work...

“Liz, if the phone rang, I'm sure I would've heard it.” Michael just had to point out for some stupid reason.

“No @#%$, Sherlock.” I mutter resentfully and then I start to think again...

I'll admit it. The phone thing was stupid but I am so totally desperate. I can't stand here any longer. I'm sick of the silence. I hate silence, remember...

I think it's my only way out. It's a pathetic escape but an escape nonetheless.

Here goes...

“Ya know what? I think it must have been coming from upstairs.” I say excitedly, without really thinking and I point to the ceiling for good measure. But I don't think it helped cause I did a quick check on Michael and The Guy and they both kinda look un-amused.

“Liz...?”

“Michael, ya know what? It's probably Maria.” I tell him matter-of-factly.

Ok, time to bring out the big guns. Or the always efficient and patented Deluca Rambling/Babbling Routine. I was always assured that it never failed.

So, here's for hoping...

“Ya know, she had to have one of those weird mother and daughter talks tonight and she always comes to me for moral support afterwards. Really! Cause you know her mom. Amy is a real character. But you would know all about that seeing how she once threatened to come after you with a shotgun for taking Maria out to that...”

Perfect. Michael's eyes just instantly grew ten fold and he is defiantly shaking his head to signal me to stop. That's good. Now all I have to do is act innocent.

“Oh. Sorry.” I quietly mutter and send a shy smile at both guys in the room.

And you know, it really amuses me to see that Max Evans has a half-smirk on his face.

Hehe.

“Liz, maybe you should go see if it was Maria. We all know how she can get if she is frustrated. She'll start smelling that aromatherapy crap tomorrow and it will scare away customers.” Michael is trying to explain his logic in a casual tone. But it's not working. And he knows it. Poor dude...

“You really think so?” I ask in a voice filled with fake concern. This part is only really icing on the top of the cake. But it is still very important. So, I continue, “Cause you know, I still have to take care of the dried flaky stuff...” I say as I wrinkle my nose at the pile.

“No, you don't.” He simply assures me.

“You'll make it go away?” I ask as I try to keep myself from laughing. This is too easy.

“Yeah. Something like that...” He says. “Just go...”

“Kay.” I smile knowing I only have one more thing to take care up.

Here I go, again...

I slowly turn myself completely towards Max Evans or The Guy (As I am not accustom to calling him.). I try to plaster a smile on my face but for some reason I can't because I all of a sudden feel really sick. But sick in a good way, kinda like being so excited or you end of feeling sick. But not...

Ok, just look him straight in the eye and apologize about the cup incident and everything will be fine.

Look. Him. Straight. In. The. Eye.

Something that is a lot easier said then done. Cause I go to look in his eyes and it's like I get lost.

I never really had time to get a good look at him in the haze of the past couple of minutes. But he's actually kinda cute. You know, in that dark, mysterious, Greek god kind of look.

Oh my god? What I am thinking? No, not happening. I am so not thinking about what I am thinking about! No. No. No. I need a new plan...

Avoid. Eyes. At. All. Costs.

Just blurt out an apology and get the hell out. That should work...in a perfect world. But this isn't a perfect world. And it's not going to work.

Cause the moment I look up for a second try, our eyes lock. And my heart stops.

No, not literally. But almost...

I feel that sick and excited feeling again. And I think he has it too.

So, we just stare. Both our eyes locked on each other's. And I am not sure why and I am not sure how, but something is happening.

Or at least, I hope something is happening...

No. No. NO. Oh my god... This can't be happening. He is the freaking KING of a freaking other PLANET! I am not supposed to get some kind of mutant butterfly feeling in my stomach when I look at him! God damn it to hell...!

It's now or never. Just say it and go call Maria. She will know what to do.

God? Please, let Maria know what to do...

Because frankly, I need help...

“Um... You know? Sorry...about the...the whole cup thing...” I stutter while my eyes are stilled lock with his. I did try to get them unlock them but it obviously didn't work.

Seriously? What could I have done? I didn't have a choice other than continuing to stare into his deep, dark eyes...

Ok, stop the laughing! It's not funny! I have essentially screwed myself! Damn it...

What the hell did I get myself into?

“And the throwing!” I add so quickly that I literally almost startle myself. “The throwing was...wasn't a good thing...” What the hell kind of thing to say is that?

Oh my god... I am so totally a complete idiot! What the hell is wrong with me?

God, why he is he smiling. Why is he smiling this shy half-smile?

“Don't worry about it.” He gently nodded his head and smiled just a little more. “It was fine.” But when he finished what he was saying he looked down.

Why did he look down? Why did he break the connection?

What the hell am I talking about? I'm so totally screwed! Oh my god...

“Yeah, just be glad she didn't have time to aim.” Michael laughed like he was completely oblivious to the fact that something was happening between The Guy and I.

Damn Michael for being dim!

Damn Max Evans for slightly laughing at Michael's dim comment!

Damn me for being pissed off that Max Evans slightly laughed at Michael's dim comment!

Oh @#%$ @#%$...

“I have to leave!” I suddenly mutter and throw a semi-dirty dish towel at Michael. “Maria. Need to call Maria...”

“Liz? You okay?” Dim Michael asks as I hurry to the back of the dining room of the Crashdown.

“Yeah, fine... Just make sure you clean the flaky dried stuff!” I call out right before I hit the door that reads, “Employees Only”.

And my escape is complete. So, I take a second to reflect. I carefully lean up against the door and take a couple deep breathes until I realize I Dim Michael is talking. And unfortunately, my curiosity is getting the better of me. I turn around and strain to hear...

There are muffles at first; I think Dim Michael is laughing. But he sounds really uncomfortable. I need to be closer. So, I crack open the swinging door just a little... And I wait to hear what will come next.

“Yeah... Liz, is a good... person...” Michael explains in a half chuckle. He sounded like he was trying to describe something almost indescribable. Either that or he couldn't find the right words.

Wonderful, Michael. Just wonderful...

I take another deep breathe and form a thought... I need Maria. God will make sure she knows what to do. I need her help and wisdom...

And I really need to get that damn song out of my head... How does it go...?

“ King of Kings, forever and ever...
And Lord of Lords, forever and ever...
King of Kings and Lord of Lords...
And He shall reign forever and ever
…”

Damn it... I really hate that song... And why the hell did it come to mind after 4 years?

Crap. I need Maria before I literally go insane. I need to talk to her now...

TBC...?


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# 5 
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Love it! Can't wait for more! Liz is just too cute for words! :lol


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Oh Destiny! How awesome! :clap :clap I can't wait to read the next part.. Wow, what a M&L rush! Thank you ;)


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# 7 

Delirious

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*Hehe. Thank you, both. I'm glad you like it... That means alot. :grin Anyway, here's the next part. Have fun reading...*

With Nothing Left To Lose.
Part 3-

Anyone want to know why I won't sing in front of people?

Emotional scarring.

And emotional wounds.

I've got 'em all.

And it's completely my mother's fault.

See, when I was in the eighth grade my dear mom thought I should become move “ involved” with the enjoyable aspects of school cause she didn't see how I could just be happy studding and hanging out with Alex and Maria.

So, what did she do? Uh huh... She talked with my school counselor, behind my back, and made a deal.

I was required to join choir. Seriously. If I didn't, I would fail the class and that would in turn lower my perfect GPA.

And I couldn't have that happen. I don't know why, call me psychotic but I wanted and needed a perfect grade because it was almost a way of measuring myself. I wanted and needed to know that I could be perfect. Stupid, I know. But I already said I needed help...

Anyway, I was placed in a choir with thirty other middle school girls. Some were cool, most were bitches. The teacher, although not a girl, was defiantly in the last category. I don't know why but Ms. Thompson defiantly had something stuck up her ass. She was hell. And I hated every freaking minute of my life with her.

Ms. Becky Thompson knowingly scarred me for life.

Because we had to do so many damn performances, so many damn competitions, and so many damn fundraisers, I finally gave up any love of singing for anyone other then myself.

I just couldn't handle it. I just didn't want to handle it. But I somehow did.

And I got the fucking A+ to prove it...

~

So, I'm now sprawled on my bed. The lights are off and the radio is softly playing some mindless pop/rock hit. One hand is covering my face in disgust; the other is holding a cordless phone to my ear. It's been three rings but I won't hang up. I need to talk to Maria.

Seriously. At least to save my own freaking sanity...

“Hello? Deluca residence...” Ha! Five rings but Maria managed to pick up.

God bless her.

But she does sound really bad. Ya know, normally I won't have called her this late at night but I think we all know that I really need to talk to her, right? Her “ beauty” sleep isn't that important, right?

I wait a beat and start, “I threw a cup at him.” I end up telling her lamely.

“Huh?” She asks. I think she just woke up or something. She doesn't sound like she is all there. I'm feeling guilty.

But oh well... I can't deal with it right now so I might as well not worry about it now, right?

Hey, there is my wonderful logic again... Cool. Anyway...

“I threw a cup at him.” I repeat.

“Huh?”

Ok. So maybe I need to try a little harder this time or something...

“I threw a cup at him

Was that a little too much?

“At who?”

Ok. I guess not.

Anyway, you know why Maria and Michael are so perfect for each other? Because they are both totally dim when I need them to be totally lit. It's sad...

“HIM!” I almost yell. “I threw a fucking cup at him! I wasn't even thinking but he just showed up and I was singing some Shades Apart song and then Michael came and I thought he raised his hand but he didn't and Michael was shouting and the guy was backing away and I threw a dirty cup at his head! Oh my god... I threw a dirty cup at him!” Ok. At this point I am about to cry. Why? I have no idea. But I am. Cause I can feel the tears start to string my eyes.

I so need help...

“Liz? Oh my god! What are you talking about? What happened? Who was raised their hand? Who the hell is “him”? Maria is just about screaming at this point.

I think she's finally awake and in the fully upright position.

“The king of kings.” I start to sing a bar of that crappy song. And now that I have time to go over everything and think about what happened, I feel the need to shrink to the size of a pea.

How could I have said and done all of those things?

What the hell was wrong with me?

How am I ever going to look anyone in the face again?

I'm so screwed...

“Oh my god...” I barely heard Maria breathe. I know she never thought Zan and Vilandra were going to actually come to Roswell, even though Michael had talked about it for like five seconds on Wednesday night. In reality, no one thought it would happen. Cause why would they? There isn't anything here and Michael and Tess go out to where ever they live pretty often. (Michael refused to tell us where they lived. He thought it would be safer if we didn't know.) So, what would be the point?

Anyway, Maria is still silent. Probably thinking about everything I said and everything Michael said and the fact that there is an alien king in the Crashdown's dining room.

Damn it...

“Maria?” I ask in a very timid small voice. “I threw a cup at king.”

“Oh sweetie. I am so sorry...” Ok, something wasn't right with that apology.

I think she's holding back giggles or something.

Oh my god! She's laughing at me! She's actually laughing at my humiliation!

“Oh my god! Maria, you're laughing at me!” I just about scream into the phone as I sit straight up.

“No, of course not! But you threw a glass at the guy's head! Kay? It's kinda funny... And I just got up. Give me a break.” She explains.

I know she knows I am not angry at her and I know she knows that I know she wasn't really laughing at me so I don't give it a second thought. As weird as that sounds...

“Oh my god, Maria. What the hell am I going to do?” I ask as I feel the warm tears come to my eyes again. I can so not cry over this. I will not cry over this. I think I just need to coach myself or something...

I will not cry, I cannot cry. I will not cry, I cannot cry. I will not cry, I cannot cry.

“I don't really know. But you got out of the room and that was very crucial. I'm sure this can be fix. Really. He probably won't even remember in the morning.”

“Maria, it is the morning.” I sigh. “Damn it... God, it's like almost one.”

“Liz, you want me to come over?” Maria asked hopefully. “Would that help any?”

“Yeah.” I tell her. “I think that's good idea. Cause I think I need to tell you the whole story...”

“What whole story? You mean, you did more than throw a cup at this head?” She giggles.

I really hate to do this but- Damn her...

“You know, I am so happy you find this so very comical.” I mutter sarcastically.

“Lizzie. Everything will be fine. In the mean time, oh my god... He's like here! In Roswell! The freakin' King of Antar!” She's smiling, I know she is. And you know what? So am I.

It's actually kind of funny. We both see him and his sister as celebrities or something. I mean, I keep referring to him as a king, when Michael has repeatedly told everyone that Max isn't a king, just like he's not a warrior. He keeps telling us that they were different “people” back then.

But we still can't break the mental image. Or maybe we don't want to...

“Maria, I could really use you here.” I tell her truthfully. “I need a friend...” I continue to choke out.

I will not cry, I cannot cry. I will not cry, I cannot cry. I will not cry, I cannot cry.

“Ok.” She has all of a sudden gotten very serious. I think she knows that the laughing time has passed and that I really need help and support.

That's why I love Maria so much, that's why we have been best friends since kindergarten.

She knows. Always has and always will.

And you know what? I don't feel like crying and I don't feel like shrinking anymore. Cause I know with Maria on my side everything will be fine. Or at least a lot of fun...

“I'll wait for you by the lockers in the back so you can see him. Michael is probably still talking to him so you could probably just go in through the front door. God, he actually told him that I was a good person after I left.” I laugh a little. “What the hell is that?”

“Well, coming from Michael, I think it is actually a pretty high compliment.” She laughs a little too. “Liz, this is fine. Don't worry about it...”

“Maria, I made a compete ass of myself and when I looked at him I got sick and...”

“YOU GOT SICK?” Maria screamed into the receiver.

Oops.

“No!” I almost screamed back. “Mentally not physically.”

“And what the hell does that mean?!”

“I don't know. You know that sick/excited feeling that isn't really a sick/excited feeling that a person can get when they look at another person?”

“Oh my god, Lizzie. Did you get butterflies?” She just asked as a joke. And I know she didn't expect the answer that I gave her but I didn't feel like lying so...

“I think.”

Dead silence.

That's all I hear.

She isn't even breathing this time.

“Liz! I'm on my way! I swear to god! I will be there in ten minutes! I swear! I will fix everything for you! Don't worry! Gottogo!” She rambles and screams.

“Ok.” I reply with another heavy sigh cause I know that telling Maria about my mutant butterflies over the phone probably wasn't the brightest idea.

“Bye!” She said excitedly.

“I'll meet you down stairs...”

And then the line was dead and I was left in silence again. Well, expect for another crappy pop hit filtering through my stereo's speakers.

Damn it... I hate Britney...

TBC...


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Ohhhh...I can't wait to see how Maria is going to "fix" this situation! :lol I love that Liz just can't get past the fact that she threw a cup at Max's head! And they think of Max and Isabel as celebrities? What's up with that? :lol :rollin2
:lol


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# 9 

Delirious

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Thanks for the FB... I've got to run but I hope you enjoy this part... Liz~

With Nothing Left To Lose.
Part 4-

Ironic irony.

What the hell does it mean?

No, I mean really...

Is it something that's real?

Is it even something that's credible?

Is it just something people use for blaming strange coincidences in their poor, pathetic lives?

Yeah, at least that's what dictionary.com thinks...

Read- “ Usage Note: The words ironically, ironic, and irony are sometimes used as events and circumstances that might better be described as simply “coincidental” or “improbable,” in that they suggest no particular lessons about human vanity or folly...”

Hehe. Ironically ironic irony...

Ya know, I have actually had a lot of “ironically ironic irony” in my life. And it defiantly all started with Michael, Tess, and the Great Robbery Attempt of 2000...

I can remember it happening so clearly. And I know all those idiots always say things like, “I remember it like it was yesterday...” but I really do. But I guess when you or someone you care about is in a situation where you or they could die, it just kinda sticks with you. Ya know?

Anyway, as I was saying, I remember that exact night so damn clearly that it's almost scary...

Alex had just come to the Crashdown to bring over a new CD that The Whits had just pressed, it contained the two songs they had been working on for the past couple of months, ‘Love Kills' and ‘Hurt by Love'. He was so proud and he had this goofy grin plastered on his already cute face.

Maria, Kyle, and I all followed him over to the old Crashdown stereo and we held our breath until the first song started.

And that's when Michael and Tess walked in...

I remember the time perfectly. It was 10:36 pm and I was going to turn around and tell who ever had came in that we were closed but once I realized who it was, I didn't care. It wasn't such an abnormality for Michael Guerin and Tess Harding to come in and have a late dinner on Friday nights, so I just smiled a half smile at them and turned my attention back to the stereo. But Alex, being so ecstatic, invited them both over to listen. Tess's face lit up with a huge smile as she accepted the invitation but Michael, being Michael, only rolled his eyes and slumped into one of the booths closest to the front.

After Tess joined us, Alex hit the ‘pause' button again and we waited to hear the first drum beat and guitar cord filter through the 5 year old speakers.

But they didn't come...

Cause it turned out that, although Nicky was great at driving a mean guitar riff, he really didn't know so much about recording.

So, the CD turned out a little on the defective side.

So, Alex started freaking out and literally started stomping his foot on the floor.

But unsurprisingly, Tess was able to “fix” things. She smiled another sweet, innocent smile and said she had “dealt” with this kind of thing before. She lightly played around with the stereo and instantly the CD started playing.

We never noticed a thing...

Maria happily turned up the volume and followed Tess back over to where Michael was seated. She took their order and handed it to me. I sauntered into the kitchen and realized that we were out of 2 of the 4 things they ordered. I silently cursed and walked back out apologizing.

“Ya know what guys? We are like out of everything... Can I get you something else?”

“No problem.” Tess answered in her always cheery tone. “How ‘bout two Men In Black Berry Pies and the cherry cokes?”

“Comin' right up!” Maria called as she giggled at something Kyle had said to her. “Lizzie, sit down. I can get everything.”

“Kay.” I answered lamely.

Hey, if she wanted to do the work, I wasn't going to argue… Would you?

“So, how long have you been playing bass, Alex?” Tess asked as she sipped the cola Maria had just brought over.

“Oh, um... A while, actually.” He answered and sat down on a stool next to where I was leaning against the cool counter.

“That's really cool. I always wanted to play a musical instrument. But I never could... Kyle, doesn't you dad play guitar or something? I think I remember him do something during one of the town's last talent show things...”

“Oh yeah, The Kit Shickers...” Kyle spoke in a somber tone as he wiped his face with the palm of his hand.

For some weird reason, Kyle considered the Kit Shickers an embarrassment or something. But I don't know why... I thought his father's band is kinda cool. But we all knew he should quit his day job or anything.

But wouldn't be funny? I could just see Sheriff Valenti leaving the force to peruse his love for country music. Anyway...

“I thought they were pretty cool...” Tess told him cheerfully.

“Thanks, I guess.” Kyle told her in a small voice as a small smile came over his lips.

And I actually couldn't stop the thought(s); Kyle likes Tess... Or Tess likes Kyle... Or they both like each other...

See, I've never get those kinda things straight. Someone likes someone. I know that much. Damn it. Anyway...

I remember it being almost like a perfect scene from a perfect TV show. Ya know those moments, where all your friends (and some people you semi-know from school) are all gathered around on a late Friday night hanging out, and everything is casual and cool, you laugh at insane things and you just feel...normal?

You know those moments?

Yeah. But then of course you all know what happens to shatter those moments, right?

Something always happens to change everything forever...

~

I waited a good 10 minutes after I hung up the phone. I waited a good 600 second after I hung up the phone. I waited one of the longest 10 minutes or 600 seconds of my life, after I hung up the phone.

Simply, because I needed help...

See, Maria lives approximately 15 minutes away. And if she is extra motivated, she can even make it in under 10. So, I feel that it' finally safe to go back down stairs and wait for her to arrive.

And I pray to god that I'm right...

I'm making it down the apartment's hall and I see the door that leads to the staircase right in front of me.

And I freeze.

I have idea how or why but I do. Something has stopped me from going back down to the Crashdown.

I think it's my nerves. I think it's my weird freak butterfly condition thing.

I think it's my own insanity...

But you know what? I'm not going to let my insanity stop me from descending down these steps. I can be strong. I can face Michael and a king.

Or at least I think I can...

I slowly open the door and take the first step. Cause this isn't so bad. I can do this.

Anyway, all I have to do is wait in the back. I don't have to see them. I don't have to hear them.

I'll be just fine.

Anyway, they're probably so engrossed with themselves and whatever new alien situation that has bestowed itself upon everyone, that they won't even noticed me poking my head through the little window to see what's going on. Right?

I have now taken a total of 6 steps, 4 more and then the last 2. I can so do this. Everything will be fine...

I just need to finish walking down the steps and then I can just sit on the crappie red coach that Alex named 5 summers ago. Sam will take care of me. He's always there when I need to sit and wait for something, so why would this be any different? I can always rely on Sam… Always...

Everything will be fine...

I feel very triumphant. I have conquered 3 more steps. The pace I'm going with is pretty slow and laughably pathetic but who cares? No one is in the back and Maria will be here to rescue me any damn minute now so it doesn't matter.

3 more steps. 2 more steps. 1 more step. And I'm down on the landing. And I'm so damn proud that I can't help myself, I end up smiling. Cause I so knew I could do this...

Everything will be fine...

I slowly turn around and look back up at the door I originally came from. 12 damn steps. I did them all. Even with what's happening with me. My nerves didn't stop me. My condition didn't stop me. And my own @#%$ insanity didn't stop me. I didn't it all on my own! All @#%$ 12 steps...

I take a deep breathe, turn back around, and once again, I end up screaming with all my @#%$ strength.

Cause everything is so not @#%$ all right anymore...

(Oh and just so you know, I have this really horribly embarrassing, really, really bad startle reflex, so yeah...)

When I came back around to the position I was standing in before, I notice a girl standing in front of me. She has long golden blonde hair and was defiantly taller then I was. She was wearing an almost cropped dark green sweater and semi-unconformable looking black pants. Very simple but very stylish. She was kinda sending me an awkward, confused look that, amazingly, didn't change much once I opened up my lungs for the second time tonight.

(Insert ear splitting scream right about here...)

Hey, maybe Michael already told her what I did the first time. Maybe she knew what I was going to do, so she wasn't that surprised. Maybe she's just an ice bitch.

Or maybe she's just the Isabel Evans everyone always talks about.

Damn it... Ya know, I really hate myself today...

After I abruptly shut my @#%$ mouth up, I hear Michael scream my name for the second time tonight. I also think I can hear Max Evans calling out to his sister.

Damn him... I was the one that screamed! Something would mostly wrong with me because I screamed! Not her!

Damn it! What the hell is wrong with me? Of course he would call for his sister!

I so hate myself right now... I so hate my jealous, green-eyed self right now...

“Liz!” Michael screams again as he comes barreling into the back room with Max on his heals.

It's actually kinda a funny scene, I would probably laugh under different circumstances. Max and Michael both look like they were kicked in the gut or something.

I think it's kind of another one of those moments where I should feel guilty.
But of course, I don't.

Cause why should I? She freakin' startled me! I had the right to scream like an insane idiot. Right?

I so hate myself right now...

Anyway, I just stare at Michael with deer-in-the-headlight eyes and this undoubtedly stupid expression on my face. And I keep staring in silence for probably 25 more seconds before clasping on my butt.

Cause ya know, I was still standing on the landing so I had a place sit. So I sat. I sat on the second to last step. Remember the one that I was so proud to conquer?

Yeah, I can almost hear it laugh this smug little stair belly laugh.

Damn piece of crap...

I should have went to Sam. I originally promised the job to Sam but he was just too far away. I needed to sit. I needed to think. Or not think. I don't know which...

But I guess it ended up being the first one...

What the hell have I done? How could I have been so stupid tonight? How could something like have happened? @#%$ “ironically ironic irony” is so not what this is!

I feel like crying again. But this time I want to let myself cry. I don't want to coach myself into keeping the tears inside. I think I need to let them out this time.

But for some reason I can't. I can't because I faintly hear Max Evans ask is I'm ok. He's asking me, if I'm ok. And I try to answer but I can't.

My brain is to numb right now.

I can't answer. But I do manage move my head a little so I can now stare at him instead of Michael.

And I feel like I want to cry again. Cause I can see so much worry and concern in his dark eyes. He looks scared, like he had done something wrong. I want to tell him that he didn't do anything. But as corny as it sounds, it felt like time was standing still. Once again, we just stared into each others eyes. And I felt sick and excided and happy and scared and love...

I swear to god, in that one single instant, I felt love...

But then I blinked. And it all ended.

I was shoved back to realize what the hell I had just done and I couldn't breath from the impact.

So, I stood up very, very abruptly and I start running towards the kitchen.

Because I knew the tears were about to fall. They were already in my eyes...

All I needed to do was blink again and it would all happen...

Oh and of course, I could hear Mikey come running after me. And I'm sure he left Max and Isabel dumbfounded, as they watched us both disappear into the Crashdown's medium sized kitchen.

Once I got into the safely area, I made it to the large stainless steal refrigerator and I sled down to the floor. I covered my face with my hands and I let the tears fall.

But these tears were no longer because of embarrassment or humility.

These tears were because something happened when I was looking into Max Evan's eyes. When I got lost in them, I was shown things, things I had never seen before... And obviously love was just the tip of the iceberg...

TBC...


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Major Rush. Must stop now. :lol :rollin2 I can't wait to see what happens next:grin ... and I must add, I just :love the parts with Sam in it. Wonder Why? LOL :lol Hurry up Maria, she's missing all the good stuff. I would of killed her by now. :lol


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Okay...are we kissing up to Bunni by naming the couch Sam? :lol I love this part! She sees love in Max's eyes and they don't even know each other yet! Sweet! Can't wait for more!


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Okay...are we kissing up to Bunni by naming the couch Sam?

:rollin2 :rollin2 LMAO. Your too funny. I'm sure she didn't, it just struck me as funny. Besides what it stands for wouldn't make sense in that case :lol I just remember (and probably always will) sitting up half a night thinking up that name because I couldn't sleep :lol Awe, sentiments.


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OMG... You guys are so funny. Hehe.
Actually, I didn't even think about Sam until you brought it up, destiny. That's so great... Um, I hate to say it but I wasn't trying to suck up to Bunnie but if it worked, WooHoo! Hehe. I was actually thinking about how it was red and how I've known like 2 Sam's and they both had red hair... And I swear that's how I came up with it... Hehe. Ok, now I just feel stupid. But anyway, here's a new part and hope you laugh some more...

With Nothing Left To Lose.
Part 5-

Blame.

I've felt the need to blame quite a lot of people in my life lately. But amazingly, only the people... I have never, for one second, felt the need to blame Michael or Tess for anything. No matter what, it didn't matter.

You see, if it wasn't for them...

Well, why don't I just continue the story? Then you can really see...

By 11:00 pm, everyone was laughing and enjoying themselves, even Michael. It was perfect, Kyle and Tess were sitting in a booth by themselves talking quite intimately about nothing in particular, Michael was arguing with Maria over why he put so much Tabasco in his soda, and Alex and I were dancing to the second track.

It really was perfect...

Before everything happened...

Before our worlds collided...

You see, in the mists of talking, auguring, and dancing no one was really able to keep an eye on the front entrance into to the café. So naturally, when Robber 1 and Robber 2 came crashing through, waving 2 semi-automatic guns in the air...all we could do was freeze...

I don't even think anyone breathed as Robert Hurts and Kevin Elles made their way into the Crashdown. I know, for a fact that I didn't... When I said, freeze, I was just about being literal.

I remember making a check around the room. I wanted to make eye-contact with everyone.

I first saw Alex, who was standing a little bit behind me. He had this very strong express on his face, almost as hard as stone.

Kyle and Tess came next.

Kyle looked like he was about blow a gasket. I tried to calm him down with my eyes but it wasn't working, he was still looking straight at Robber 1.

Tess's face was not even turned anywhere towards me, so I skipped her and tried to find Maria.

And Maria's face scared me. She looked like she had just realized that her life was about to end. She was frowning and the tears in her eyes were quietly making there way down her cheeks. I started to cry, myself, after seeing her...

Much like Alex, Michael's face was almost expressionless. And he was looking forward, dead forward. Not at the robbers, not at me. Without even thinking, I turned and tried to find what he was looking at and it really didn't surprise me when I found that he was starring straight into Tess's bright blue eyes.

“You @#%$ work here?” Robert Hurts, the obvious leader, asked me.

“Leave her alone. I can get you what you need.” Alex told him coolly after coming to stand in front of me.

“Alex!” Maria screeched from beside Michael. “God, please...”

“God has nothing to do with this!” Kevin yelled as he took a step towards the booth she shared with Michael. And still, Michael was starring at Tess.

“What do you want?” Kyle asked with certain strength in his voice. He quickly looked over at Tess, frowned at got up to stand but was stopped with Kevin's yells again.

“You @#%$ stop moving! I will blow everyone's @#%$ brains out if you move again! Ya hear?!”

I still stood frozen in time, with the lyrics for Alanis Morrisette's song Ironic, running through my head, Maria whimpered, and Alex carefully nodded his head.

“ And isn't it ironic, don't you think.
A little too ironic, and yeah I really do think...
”

“Geez, Kevin...” Robert muttered as he moved to the cash register on the small counter by the door. “Always with the extra drama...”

I did another face check. I nodded at Maria to let her know that everything would be okay and while I was doing that, I caught Michael shaking his head at Tess. But Tess was nodding back. And Michael didn't seem to agree with her. But he finally mouthed a bad word with his mouth and silently agreed.

I didn't have time to see what happened next because Robert's shouts of the machine not working and Kevin's advances brought me out of thought.

“You!” He screamed and flashed his less then perfect teeth at me.

“Just leave her alone... I work here too. I will help you.” Alex told him in a very authoritative tone.

“Nah. I don't need you. I need her.” He smiled again and started walking towards me. “She can help us. Can't ya?”

“I don't know.” I tryed to say in a normal tone but I really wasn't stunned when my voice crack in several different places.

“Just get her over here already!” Robert yelled as he smacked the side of the register. “Damn piece of crap... This was @#%$ easier at the damn 7-11 across town...”

“Come with me.” Kevin Elles aimed the gun at me chest and I nodded.

“I think you need to leave her alone.” Kyle explained as he finally was able to stand.

“Well, I don't give a @#%$ about what you think.” Kevin laughed and came to stand behind me.

Alex then turned around and sent me a small smile. “Just do what he says, Liz. Do what he says...” I nodded again as Mr. Elles and I made our way over to Robert and the old cash register.

After that, everything went into a sort of ‘fast forward' mode.

I remember punching in the code of the register and feeling the cold barrel of the gun being pressed into my neck, I remember seeing Tess faintly smile at me and then close her eyes tight, I remember her screaming shortly afterward and Michael screaming for me to get down, I remember trying to but not being able to because Kevin was holding on the back of my neck, I remember Alex screaming and ripping me away from Kevin's grasp, I remember hearing a gunshot and at the same time, seeing a burst of light come out of Michael's hand...

But I don't really remember what happened.

And that was exactly what I planned to tell the Sheriff Valenti when I saw him burst through the door with 3 men behind him...

~

I feel like a complete idiot. I'm just sitting here; with my knees drawn up to my chest and my blood shot eyes leaking enough water to make Roswell a lush paradise and not a dry dustbowl. And all I can think about is Max Evans and the endless things I was shown...

“Liz?” Michael is kneeling in front of me. He has this really sad expression on his face. And he's defiantly worried about me.

“What” I manage to choke out. Ya know, it's been a good 7 minutes and I'm still crying my eyes out.

Damn it... I just feel really weak. I'm not handling everything...

“Liz, what happened?” He asks me calmly. It's kinda sad; he really doesn't know what to do. He doesn't know why I'm crying, he doesn't know how to make me feel better. So, all he can really do sit here with me and ask standard questions until I pull myself together.

See, normally that would work. But not this time. Cause this time is defiantly not normal and it's defiantly not under normal circumstances. It's not working and I doubt it will.

I think about his question for a second and then I let the flood continue.

When I was looking at Max Evan's something happened. I have no idea what. But it was like I saw inside of him. For that small instant, I felt what he felt, I knew what he knew. I saw flashes and images of his childhood, of his memories, of his battles. In that instant, I saw into his soul. Completely and freely...

Oh @#%$ @#%$...

What the hell have I gotten myself into?

“Liz, please?” Michael's pleading with me now... But I don't know what I can do to make him feel better. I don't even think I want to make him feel better. I shouldn't be worried about him right now... I should be worried about me...

Ya know something? Guilt sucks...

“I'm fine, Michael...” I end up telling him between sobs.

“Liz, I really think...”

“Shh...” I cut him off, really quickly. I think I hear Maria. “Did you hear that?” I whisper in a rush. She has to be here. I need her here.

“No, what'd you hear this time?” He asks disbelievingly, with a small smile on his face. Maybe he's getting flash backs of the whole phone thing from earlier. Who knows?

“Shh!” I whisper again as I wipe my eyes and cheeks with the palms of my hands. I'm trying desperately to get the tear tracks off of my face but I can tell it's not working. Mascara and eye liner are probably smudged all over my face and I must look like @#%$. But Maria will help me. She can make everything okay. She always does...

“Liz?” He asks me questionably.

“Follow me.” I instruct while I start crawling towards the kitchen doors that lead into the back room. And amazingly, the voices get louder as I get closer...

“...Hi, I'm Maria Delcuca. You guys must be Michael's friends...”

I can't help but smile. Maria's here and she's brave. Really very brave...

“Um...” Max stutters. “I guess...”

“That's cool.” Maria laughs a semi-fake laugh that only I would recognize as her “semi-fake laugh”.

“Yeah. Um, I'm Max Evans and this is my sister, Isabel.”

“Well, it's really a pleasure to meet you both. Our little Mikey has really been looking forward to your arrival.” She continues.

“Really?” Isabel asks in an almost snotty tone. “Michael?”

“Uh huh... Michael.” Maria answered back with a spark in her voice. She's won't take any crap from anyone, royal status regardless.

“We weren't even sure we were coming so...” Max explained as he obviously tried to play peace maker.

“Oh.” Maria told him blankly. “Anyway, I should find him,” Maria perked up. “And another one of our friends. She's this cute petite brunette that's probably wearing a waitress's uniform. Have you seen either one of them?” She finished lightly. “I really think I should find them.”

“Um...” He stuttered again. “I think they went in there.”

“In the kitchen?” She asked instantly dropping the act and perky pitch in her voice. “Why'd they be in the kitchen?”

“Beats me! She got all freaked out when she first saw me and so she screamed. And then she just got up and ran through those doors... Michael followed her and we haven't heard from them since.” Isabel explained, in a full out snotty tone.

Damn it, what the hell is her problem? She doesn't need to act all high and mighty right now. And so what if I'm going through some issues at this moment and if I've made a complete ass out of myself? She could at least try to be sympathetic. Damn her...

“Oh my god... She screamed again.” Maria muttered with a sigh. I want to say that I didn't mean to but I bite my tongue. I need to let this play out. I think...

“Yeah, she screamed.” Isabel answered. “Does she get scared really easily or something because I was just standing there and flipped out...”

“Yeah. Um, she's got this really bad startle reflex... Anyway, you're sure they went into the kitchen?”

“Yeah.” Max answered in a small voice.

“Kay, great... Why don't you guys just have a seat on Sam and I'll be out in a minute...”

“Excuse me?” Max jumped comfortably. “What did you say?”

“What? What are you talking about?” Maria asked him, feeling completely confused.

“You want us to sit on Sam?” Isabel spat out.

“Oh!” Maria laughed. “Yeah, red coach behind you... Named a couple summers ago...”

“What the hell is wrong with her?” I tune out and ask Michael, who is kneeling next to me.

“Who? You mean Isabel?” He asks.

“Yeah. She really has issues...” I laugh.

“That she does...” And he laughs too.

And for a second, I decide to tune everything out and think...

Ya know, maybe this might not be that bad. Yes, I've made a complete ass out of myself on several different occasions tonight and yes, I've formed feelings for Max Evans in a record amount of time and I've seen into this soul but it still might not be that bad. I can overcome these things. I can forget and I'm sure they will forgive... Everything will be fine. It's just a bad day; it's just a bad day that will come to an end.

Everything will be fine.

Anyway, I start to feel a little less insignificant, pathetic, and weak as I continue to think my good thoughts. But unfortunately for me, all of those wonderful feelings got sent to hell, once my senses were compromised because of a wooden door slamming into my head...

“@#%$!” I screamed and grabbed the side of my head. “@#%$ @#%$... That hurt!”

“Liz!” Maria screamed. “Oh my god! I...I didn't know you were there! Oh my god! Are you okay?!” She rambled.

“@#%$ peachy!” I reply before thinking and before realizing that Max and Isabel were both staring down at me with looks of horror plastered on their faces. And ya know what? I really can't tell, if it's because of what happened to me or because I used “bad words”.

How @#%$ sad it that?

“Liz, are you sure you're okay?” Michael asked while helping me to my feet.

“I already told you. Peachy...” I snap coldly. This just so isn't my night. Ya know?

TBC...


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Poor Liz is having the night from hell! Sounds like what would happen to me if I was in that situation! Everything and anything goes wrong! :lol Hope you post a new part soon! :)


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That's so great... Um, I hate to say it but I wasn't trying to suck up to Bunnie but if it worked, WooHoo! Hehe.


Bwhahahhahaha... What am I the prize control now? :lol :rollin 2 Thank you, but not needed one bit, honest.;)


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Nah...I was just kidding about the sucking up to Bunni part...although it does work out nicely! :lol Just kidding.


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OMG LMAO.. that part was just hilarious :lol I about fell out of my chair when she wacked her in the head with the door :rollin :rollin Great Part :clap :clap I just can't stop laughing, poor Liz :shake :lol


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Btw destiny~ you shouldn't feel stupid at all :shake . If it makes you feel any better, I try to kiss someone's ass everyday :lol Let's face it, it gets you farther in this world with a little sugar & honey than nothing at all. :grin :grin


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:lol :lol That's a fact Jen...everyday you need to kiss someone's backside to get something! Amazing! :lol


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Yep, it's either that or money:lol .. Such a shame how the world works these days :shake :shake


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