Episode 511 - Something Wild

[The Potter B&B. Joey is sitting on the couch watching TV when Bessie walks into the room going through some mail.]

Host: Katy Mangus, come on down! [Applause and music]

Joey: Is that the mail?

Bessie: No, Joey. Your grades haven't come yet.

Joey: Believe me, grades are the furthest thing from my mind right now.

Bessie: You can stop with the nonchalant attitude. I know it's driving you crazy.

Joey: Actually, something else is driving me crazy.

Bessie: Do you want to talk about it?

Joey: Bess, stop bugging me.

Bessie: I was talking about Dawson and Jen.

Joey: Thank you so much for the reminder, Bess. Now if you don't mind, I would like to get back to enjoying my vacation.

Bessie: You should enjoy your vacation, so why don't you get off the sofa and go do something fun?

Joey: Just because I'm not in Daytona, participating in some wet t-shirt contest, doesn't mean I'm not having any fun.

Bessie: Come on, Joey. When's the last time you did something wild?

Joey: I'm wild quite frequently.

Bessie: Letting your hair air-dry doesn't count.

Joey: I'll run with the scissors later, ok?

Bessie: Isn't there someone you can call?

Joey: Maybe I'll call Dawson and Jen. Maybe not.

[Knock on door]

Bessie: hey.

Pacey: Hey. I love this place. The Potter B&B. It seems like just yesterday I was dancing in the kitchen with Frederick Fricke.

Joey: Aren't you supposed to be dancing in the kitchen with Danny Brecher?

Pacey: No, I had to come into town and pick something up. How's the vacation going?

Bessie: Behold the human vegetable.

Joey: Actually, I'm having a wonderful time. I'm reading, relaxing, watching TV, and totally and completely enjoying myself.

Pacey: Well, that's good to hear. I just dropped by to see if you wanted a ride back to Boston, but I will see you there.

[Joey's eyes light up]

Joey: You're going back to Boston?

Pacey: Yeah, I'm leaving right now.

[Joey gets up grabs her coat and goes over to grabs Pacey's arm to leave.]

Joey: Bye, Bess. I've had a wonderful time. Thank you for everything. I love you. Give Alexander a big kiss for me. [She pulls him out the door]Come on.

[Opening Credits]

[Commercial Break]

[Inside Dawson's Jeep. Dawson and Jen are riding in the on the highway to Capeside, and Jen is going through some pamphlets.]

Jen: check this out. You have got to take this class, Dawson. Um, "the Kasdan family: A colloquium in the dynastic rule in Hollywood."

Dawson: You really want me to enroll in this local college, don't you?

Jen: It sounds like they have an amazing film program, and I think that you'd probably get a lot out of it.

Dawson: Ok. Well, I'll think about it later. I just want to savor the significance of this moment. This is the first time I've ever brought a girl home.

Jen: [Chuckles] well, I'd hate to ruin the moment for you, but I think that I'm actually going through a rite of passage here, too. This is the first time that I've been brought home.

Dawson: Really?

Jen: Yeah, usually I get brought to a motel.

Dawson: We've already done that.

Jen: Yes, we have.

Dawson: If you want to do it again, you just let me know.

Jen: Why, Dawson leery, I am shocked at your presumptuousness.

Dawson: You know, you might not want to do grams while you're running your hand on my thigh, 'cause it's just a little, uh...

Jen: I'm sorry.

[Radio plays music]

[Inside Pacey's Red Mustang. Joey and Pacey are headed back to Boston, and talking to one another.]

Joey: of course he ended up with her. I mean, Jen's spontaneous and wild. In the end, guys always end up with the wild girl. I could see it on his face the first time he saw her get out of that taxi.

Pacey: You're really gonna have to get past this, Jo.

Joey: I'm past it. I'm totally past it. In fact, I rarely even think about them, pace.

Pacey: Oh, they just happened to be on your mind right now.

Joey: No, actually, I was wondering whether or not this car is yours.

Pacey: It is, indeed. All 289 horses.

Joey: Where did you get all of these horses?

Pacey: You know, I actually have something much more interesting to talk to you about. It just so happens that there's an opening for a waitress at civilization. Interested?

Joey: Surely you don't think there's a chance in hell that I'd once again serve food to hungry people.

Pacey: All I know is that with your qualifications, Brecher would love you.

Joey: Yeah, and after the recommendation I'd get from Mrs. Valentine, the food and beverage industry would not be a career option.

Pacey: Hey, speakin' of... Check your grades lately?

Joey: Not yet.

Pacey: Really? You seem pretty carefree about the whole thing, Jo.

Joey: Well, that's me. When it comes to grades, I'm all about the carefree.

Pacey: So, you're freakin' out.

Joey: No, pace. Sorry to disappoint you, but I've changed.

Pacey: Oh, really?

Joey: I mean, I took my tests, I did my best, and there's nothing more I can do, so I'm moving on.

Pacey: Tell me honestly you're not going to run to the bursar's office as soon as you get home to check on your grades.

Joey: You know, there's a fundamental difference between having a thought and actually acting upon it.

Pacey: This is true, and there's also a fundamental difference between saying that you're gonna change and actually doing it.

[The Leery House. Dawson and Jen pull up the house and Dawson gets out of the jeep first.]

Jen: I can't get out.

Dawson: I got it.

Jen: Thanks. [Sighs] Dawson, what did your mom say when you told her about us?

Dawson: Nothing, really.

Jen: [Whines] I foresee strangeness on the horizon.

Dawson: It can't be as bad as the dinner from hell. Right?

Jen: But she's gonna know why we were so late.

Dawson: How could she possibly know?

[Gale comes outside to see them.]

Gale: Ah, you made it.

Jen: Hey.

Dawson: Hey.

Gale: Oh, I was starting to get worried.

Dawson: Yeah, well, we stopped for a little while. To get gas.

Jen: To rest... And we got some gas.

Dawson: Then we rested a little bit.

Gale: Uh, honey?

Dawson: Yeah.

Gale: You're, uh, t-shirt, it's on inside-out.

Dawson: Let's, uh, let's eat then.

Jen: I'm just a hungry, hungry girl who's traveled a long way today.

[Outside Joey's Dorm Room. Joey and Pacey are just walking up to the door.]

Pacey: So, what are you gonna do in this place all by yourself for several days?

Joey: I'm going to enjoy having my room all to myself.

[They open the door to see Audrey sitting on her bed listening to music.]

Audrey: Joey?!

Joey: Audrey.

Audrey: Hey! Did you miss me?

Joey: Audrey, what are you doing here?

Audrey: Oh, well, I got in last night. God, I am so glad to see you. Ok, this place is deserted. There's no one around, and I'm starving.

Pacey: Did you ever consider maybe going to a restaurant? There are a couple of those here in Boston.

Audrey: And eat by myself? Please.

Joey: I thought you were with your parents in telluride.

Audrey: Yeah, we were. But we had this big fight about money, and they even suggested I get rental boots. Can you believe that?

Pacey: Well, what's wrong with rental boots?

Joey: Hard to coordinate with a hot-pink bunny suit.

Audrey: Oh, and get this, I can't give my campus tours anymore. Apparently some woman complained because I was hitting on her son. How was I supposed to know he was in high school? I don't know, you guys. Looks like I might have to get a job.

[Joey looks and Pacey and smiles.]

Audrey: What?

[The Restaurant. Pacey is telling Audrey about the job and what she is expected to do.]

Audrey: I am so perfect for this job. I'm basically just gonna have dinner with lots of fun, new people every night.

Pacey: No, the job is to bring them dinner, not date them.

Audrey: Ok, I know that, but-- people want a little personality with their dining experience. People want good food, professionally served. I love the way everything comes on a "bed of" or "drizzled" with something. It's so thrilling. Listen, um, "grilled fois gras, drizzled with a mango sauterne reduction sauce." I can so sell that. What the hell is fois gras?

Pacey: It's fattened duck liver.

Audrey: Eww, that's just wrong.

Pacey: Oh, you wouldn't say that if you tried it. Trust me, it would blow your mind.

Audrey: [Laughs] tell me something. Does this sort of thing usually work with the ladies?

Pacey: What sort of thing?

Audrey: The "if I'm this passionate about the sensual art of cooking, imagine how good I am in bed" thing?

Pacey: Mm-hmm.

Audrey: Hmm. Imagine how good you'd do if you actually trimmed your nails.

Pacey: Well, I'm a busy guy.

Audrey: Hey, you were the one who was talking about professionalism, buddy.

[Danny who has been listening in on them, comes over to join them.]

Danny: Hey, Witter. Is this your girlfriend?

Pacey: No, no. Nooo, this is Audrey. She's here to interview for the waitress position.

Audrey: Hi. I really love what you've done with the place.

Danny: Welcome aboard, Audrey.

Audrey: What?

Danny: Welcome aboard? Any woman that can put Witter in his place like that is the kind of woman that I want working for me. Can you start tomorrow?

Audrey: Absolutely!

Danny: Fantastic. I'll go get you the paperwork. You, young man, make sure that she tastes the fois gras. It's fantastic.

Audrey: I love that guy.

[The Leery House Living room. Dawson and Jen are sitting together on the couch when Gale comes in with a tray of drinks and snacks.]

Gale: Whoops. Oh, it's ok, honey.

Dawson: I got it.

[Dawson grabs the tray from her, and sets it down on the table.]

Gale: Thanks. So, uh, Jen, how's school going? Have you thought about a major yet?

Jen: Not really. I'm just-- I'm just trying to take it day by day right now. So, how is the lovely Lili Leery?

Gale: She took her first steps the other day. She was, like, so cute.

Jen: Aw.

Dawson: But you haven't put the baby gate up yet on the stairs.

Gale: Honey, I will.

Jen: Ok.

Jen: Have you met your new neighbors yet?

Gale: You know, the people that bought your old house, they just use it as a summer place. It's been boarded up the rest of the year.

Jen: It's sort of sad to think of that house all cobwebby.

[Telephone rings]

Gale: oh, excuse me. Hello? No, it's still leaking? Well, no, I kinda need to get it fixed...

Dawson: Wait, the plumber hasn't fixed the leak at the restaurant yet?

Gale: Like now.

Dawson: Give me that. [takes the phone from her]You were supposed to have that fixed last week. No. Meet me there in 15 minutes. I'll be right there.

Gale: Honey, you just got here. Stay with Jen.

Dawson: Don't worry about it, ok? I'll be right back.

Jen: Ok.

[He bends over and kisses her before leaving her and Gale alone.]

Gale: So, uh, you two are dating now.

[The Bursars office. Joey is in the hallway going from one posting board to another looking for her grades in her classes. She keeps following her SSN for each class to a Grade of A. Then she turns to find the English Lit, grades have not been posted. When she turns to leave, she bumps into Prof. Wilder.]

Wilder: ah, my favorite obsessive-compulsive freshman.

Joey: Uh, I was just on my way to the library.

Wilder: That's on the other side of campus.

Joey: No wonder I couldn't find it.

Wilder: Heh heh heh. How'd you do?

Joey: Uh, so far, 4 as.

Wilder: I bet you're looking for this.

Joey: Oh.

Wilder: Oh? Oh what? Oh, my? Oh, crap? Oh, give me that right this second before I jump out of my skin? You're about to find out the results of months' worth of sweat and labor, and "oh" is all you can say for yourself?

Joey: You're having way too much fun here.

Wilder: Job perk.

[Joey takes the grades and finds that she received an A.]

Joey: Oh, my god.

Wilder: I take it you're not gonna contest the grade?

Joey: No. Heh heh heh.

Wilder: You deserve it.

[She jumps up and down enthusiastically, and then hugs Prof. Wilder]

[Commercial Break]

[At the Club. Joey and Audrey are sitting at a table together talking about how she hugged Prof. Wilder after getting her grade.]

Audrey: A hug?! What kind of hug?

Joey: It was just a hug.

Audrey: I'm sorry, but hugging the most gorgeous man on campus could never be just a hug. How long did it last?

Joey: I don't know.

Audrey: Ok, exactly and precisely, which body parts made contact and where?

Joey: Ok, we had sex.

Audrey: Really?

Joey: Right there in the bursar's office on the formica. It was wild, passionate, hot, animalistic sex.

Audrey: I hate you.

Joey: It was a hug. I was excited. It was an excited hug, so no big deal.

Audrey: No kissing at all? You swear?

Joey: Audrey, of course not.

Audrey: Ok, well, the fact that you can at least hug professor wilder proves that there's still hope for you yet.

Joey: Good to know.

Audrey: This is our night, Joey potter. We're gonna celebrate. We're gonna cut loose. Tonight, we're gonna kiss some boys.

Joey: Which boys?

[A guy is walking by, and Audrey stops him.]

Audrey: Oh, hi. Excuse me. I know this may sound a little bit forward, but, um, would you kiss my friend here?

Guy: Ok.

Joey: Uh, you know, I'd love to make out with you, but... Until my tongue completely heals, I--I just think it's too risky.

Audrey: There was a piercing incident with-- it was bad.

[The guy looks at her weirdly and walks away.]

[The restaurant. Pacey is getting ready to leave when Danny stops him.]

Danny: I wanna talk to you, Witter.

Pacey: Don't worry. I already told Audrey not to show up looking like a showgirl tomorrow to work.

Danny: What are you talking about? I like Audrey. She's a good hire. This is about you. How long have you been here?

Pacey: All right, look. I meant to tell you about those lobsters. I really did. It just slipped my mind.

Danny: It's been almost 6 months since you dragged your sorry ass in here, and since then, you've learned everything from apples to zucchinis and everything in between.

Pacey: Maybe you could just cut to the chase and tell me what I did.

Danny: You impressed me.

Pacey: Well, generally, that's considered a good thing.

Danny: Indeed it is, and something that is terribly difficult to do.

Pacey: So then you're not chewing me out.

Danny: No. I'm promoting you. Which means I'm giving you a 20% increase in your salary.

Pacey: Ok, you have to forgive the look of shock on my face, but I'm shocked.

Danny: Yeah? Well, wait till you see this. You've done a tremendous job, Pacey. I knew you had the talent when you walked in here, but I wasn't sure you had the character to see it through. It's good work.

[Danny throws him a small envelope]

Pacey: Ok, seriously. Is there a note in here that says "I'm screwin' with you, Witter"?

Danny: Absolutely. Several notes. C-notes. You never came to pick up your holiday bonus.

[He opens it to find it filled with several hundred-dollar bills.]

Pacey: I didn't know there was a holiday bonus.

Danny: Happy belated holidays, chef Witter. I'm glad you stayed.

Pacey: Thanks, Danny. Um, I'll talk to you tomorrow.

Danny: Witter.

Pacey: Yeah.

Danny: What is it you wanted to tell me about the lobsters?

[The club. Audrey and Joey are walking out onto the dance floor watching the band play.]

Audrey: God, I love college life. Why would I ever want to leave all this?

Joey: Because at some point, you have to pay off all the loans you're using to finance all of this.

Audrey: Ok. No, there will be no pragmatism tonight. I'll have none of it. Only irrational, reckless flights of fancy. Ooh. Speaking of which, now, there is a highly kissable boy. He's cute.

[Joey looks up to the band and sees the Bass player that Audrey is referring to.]

Joey: Cute?

Audrey: Come on, Joey. That guy is gorgeous.

Joey: Ok, he's gorgeous and... Familiar.

[She recognizes him as Charlie]

Audrey: We have to plot some smart, subtle way for you to meet him.

Joey: How about I go up to him and say, "aren't you Charlie, the guy who dicked over Jen?"

Audrey: That's Charlie? Charlie the jerk?

Joey: In the flesh.

Audrey: Ooh, such beautiful flesh for a jerk. Jen has good taste in men. I mean... [] Musicians, you know? These guys rock.

Joey: I know what you mean.

Audrey: No, really. I mean, they've gotten better. I wonder if they remember me from when I sang with them.

Joey: Well, you're very hard to forget, Audrey.

Audrey: You really think so?

Joey: There are few things in life I'm more certain of.

Audrey: I'm gonna go talk to them, ok?

Joey: Good luck.

[Audrey walks away, and Pacey sneaks up from behind to scare Joey.]

Pacey: Ra!

Joey: [Gasps]

Pacey: Ha ha ha ha. So, this is where all the beautiful, smart girls hang out, huh? I gotta start going to these college clubs more often.

Joey: You got my message?

Pacey: I did indeed. A 4.0. I'm sure you'll do better next semester, Jo.

Joey: I'm glad you decided to join us.

Pacey: Well, I have something to celebrate tonight. I got a promotion.

Joey: That's awesome. [Suddenly Joey recognizes the singer] Hey, I know that voice.

Audrey Singing: When they gathered round and started talking cousin Billy would take me walking

Joey: Audrey's excited about her new job, and when Audrey's excited about something...

Pacey: How did we ever get through high school without that girl?

Joey: Lord knows to my surprise.

Audrey Singing: The only one who could ever reach me, was the son of a preacher man. the only boy who could ever teach me , was the son of a preacher man. yes, he was, he was, oh, yes, he was being good isn't always easy no matter how hard I tried when he started sweet talking to me he'd come tell me everything is alright he'd kiss and tell me everything is alright can I get away again tonight? The only one who could ever reach me was the son of a preacher man the only boy who could ever teach me was the son of a preacher man yes, he was, he was, oh, yes, he was

[cheers and applause]

[The Leery House. Jen and Gale are installing a child gate in front of the stair.]

Jen: you know, he just-- he loves you and this family and this house so much that...

Gale: Sometimes I wonder if it doesn't hold him back from moving forward with his life. Well, he seems to be moving forward with parts of his life just fine.

Jen: Parts that you aren't entirely pleased about.

Gale: Am I that transparent?

Jen: Everything is really nice between us, gale. I really just am kind of crazy about him, and I want him to be happy.

Gale: Well, then we both want the same things.

Jen: How would you feel if he moved into grams' attic?

Gale: Well, I would miss having him around here, but, um, I know that he needs to get a place of his own.

Jen: Has he told you about this, um, film school in Boston that he's been looking into?

Gale: No, he didn't mention it. Every time I bring up school, he conveniently changes the subject, but I would love it if he went back to school.

Jen: Me, too.

Gale: So, have you talked to him about it?

Jen: Hmm, well, I've danced around the subject.

Gale: Oh, no, honey. You can't dance, you gotta really tell him.

Jen: I'm just afraid of pushing him into something that's he's not ready for.

Gale: No, no. Jen, Dawson has inherited a stubborn streak a mile long from his father. Trust me. You're gonna have to push him.

[The club. Joey is standing next to the bar, when the guy from before comes up behind her.]

Guy: I just wanted to let you know that we don't have to kiss. There are other things that, uh-- well, hi, um, my name is tom.

Joey: I'm sure you're a really sweet guy, and probably a world-class macking master, but my friend over there, she really needs to return to the mother ship. No hard feelings?

Male Voice: Can I buy you something to drink?

Joey: Clearly, subtext and humor have no effect on stupidity. Would you please leave me—

[She turns to see that it is Charlie]

Charlie: nice.

Joey: Do you really think you should bandy about words you don't understand?

Charlie: Stop. Just stop.

Joey: Stop what?

Charlie: The castrating shrew routine. The defense mechanism. Look, I totally understand how a girl who looks like you needs one, but you can drop it around me. All I want to do is meet you and talk a little. Ok. Fine. I'll start. Hi. I'm Charlie.

Joey: Charlie, how about we talk about why, out of all of these girls in the entire club, I'm the blessed one. I mean... What is it about me that piqued your interest?

Charlie: It's the hair-behind- the-ear thing. You know, that little tuck you do. Look. Sometimes, when I'm having a tough night, I look out into the audience for someone who's really listening. It makes me feel like I'm connecting. And I saw you, standing next to your friend, staring at me. And... I noticed the way you kept tucking your hair behind your ears, like you were trying extra-hard to listen. And I thought to myself, I want to meet that beautiful girl.

Joey: So tell me. Does this sort of thing actually work?

Charlie: I wouldn't know. I'm not like the rest of these pre-epoch Neanderthals in this place.

Joey: No?

Charlie: I've never done this before.

Joey: Really?

Charlie: Yeah.

Joey: So, you must've used a different tact with Jen Lindley, huh?

Charlie: Hmm. Joey, the smart girl from Worthington.

Joey: Charlie, womanizer from Boston bay.

Charlie: This is deeply humiliating. Mm. Hey, you can't blame a guy for trying.

Joey: No, but you don't have to have a drink with him.

[Outside the Leery House. It is night time, and Dawson comes up to the porch to see Jen sitting outside on it waiting for him.]

Dawson: Any interest in some make-up sex?

Jen: Oh, I don't know. You look pretty wiped out, pal. Ohh! I don't think you'd be up for it.

Dawson: I'm an 18-year-old guy who just lost his virginity. You'd be surprised at what I'm up for. How was your evening?

Jen: Well... Most of it was spent talking to your mom.

Dawson: Any strangeness?

Jen: A little, but... I think that once she realized I was after you for more than your body, she lightened up.

Dawson: Please tell me that's not what you guys talked about.

Jen: We talked about you... Moving to Boston. A certain attic with your name on it, an attic that would be a really great place for you to study.

Dawson: You know I've been thinkin' seriously about that, but right now... It's just not the right time.

Jen: Actually, it is, and I'm not the only one who feels that way.

Dawson: Ok, when did you and my mom suddenly become close enough to start trading insights about what's best for my life?

Jen: [Sighs] sweetie, you're not required to be the husband. Families are complicated.

Dawson: It's not that simple.

Jen: You think that I don't know that?

Dawson: Well, you have to admit you're not the best person in the world to be giving me advice on parents.

Jen: That's not fair.

Dawson: I'm just stating the facts, Jen. I mean, how can you give me advice about how to deal with my mother when you don't even talk to yours? I appreciate how much you care about...My life, but...If you want to talk to me about how I should live it, we should find a different subject.

Jen: I actually don't really want to talk to you at all right now.

[Jen looks upset at him, and then leaves him all alone on the porch as she walks off into the darkness.]

Dawson: [Sighs]

[Commercial Break]

[The Club. Audrey and Pacey are playing a game of pool, and several men are gawking at Audrey as she sinks yet another ball.]

[Music playing]

Pacey: hey! Do you mind? We're trying to have a game here.

Audrey: Yeah. We're trying to have a game here. What an annoyance.

Pacey: Oh, yes, I can see how annoyed you are.

[Audrey then sinks the 8-ball]

Audrey: Ok. You rack them, I'll crack them, baby.

Joey: Hey!

Pacey: Hi. Do you want to play against her?

Joey: Ah...No. I'll let you enjoy the indignity.

Pacey: Thank you. So, tell me, how long after we left your room today did you run down to the bursar's office to check on your grades?

Joey: Ok, I'm an obsessive freak, I freely admit it. There is no hope for me.

Pacey: No, that's not true. There is a part of you that knows how to let loose. You just have to... Let her loose every once in a while.

Joey: What part?

Pacey: The other Joey. The carefree girl who knows how to drink and play strip poker and go away on a sailboat for a summer. The girl who can get up in front of a crowd of complete strangers and sing at a beauty pageant.

Joey: Other Joey?

Pacey: Yes, the other Joey. The girl who knows better than to let things that are completely out of her control bother her.

Joey: Like Dawson and Jen.

Audrey: Hey, guys! You wanna know why else I love pool? Because the chalk matches my eye shadow! How cute is that?

Joey: You know, I think I'm gonna head over to the bar, and, uh, I'm gonna keep my eyes open for that other girl.

Pacey: Right. Well, if you see that girl, would you buy her a drink? Actually, will you buy all of us a drink, on me?

[Pacey hands her a Hundred dollar bill]

Joey: Sure. Wow, where did you get this kind of money?

Pacey: Well...I work for a living.

[Joey walks off towards the bar, when Charlie walks up from behind and tries to hand her a drink.]

Charlie: I believe this is what you're drinking.

Joey: You again?

Charlie: Hey, what can I say? I don't give up easily.

Joey: You know, helping a girl get a drink doesn't absolve you from cheating on her friend.

Charlie: I'm not looking for absolution. I'm looking for a second chance.

Joey: Well, Jen is not currently swimming in the available pool right now. Maybe you haven't heard.

Charlie: I'm talkin' about you.

Joey: A second chance with me? I hadn't realized you ever had a first.

Charlie: What exactly did I do that was so terrible? All right, I hit on you. Is that a crime? Please! If there's anything I'm guilty of, it's simply being attracted to you. I never said anything to you that I didn't mean. I think you are beautiful, and truth be told, I think you're drop-dead gorgeous.

Joey: What, the whole "I'm just a bass player you can take home to mama" thing didn't work, so now you're using simple flattery?

Charlie: Ok, so I made a fool out of myself before. That I'm prepared to do.

Joey: Well, good. Because you display quite a mastery at that particular skill.

Charlie: Give me as much crap as you want. At least I'm not afraid to take a chance.

Joey: What, are you implying that I am?

Charlie: When was the last time you took one?

Joey: Well, that's none of your business.

Charlie: Do they teach classes in uptight at Worthington, or is it just a prerequisite for admission?

Joey: I'm not uptight.

Charlie: Then why won't you tell me when the last time was you took a chance?

Joey: Because I'm not going to recount my reckless behavior for you.

Charlie: I bet there's not much to recount. But I'll bet the list of prudish perfectionism goes on and on, ad nauseam. Come on. Joey... The smart girl from Worthington, when was the last time you did something completely and indisputably wild?

[The Leery Dock. Dawson is sitting on the end of the pier just looking out into the creek, when his mother comes walking down to join him.]

Dawson: Mom, what are you still doin' up?

Gale: Oh, I thought I'd come out and get some air.

Dawson: And have a little... Heart-to-heart with your son?

Gale: Oh, I'm getting really bad at keeping my feelings hidden in my old age.

Dawson: You're not old.

Gale: It's funny. Before you got here today, I was all worried about what might be going on in my house after I went to sleep tonight, and... Now I seem to be a little worried about what's not going on.

Dawson: We had our first fight, I guess. We'll work it out.

Gale: Until you really let go of this house, I don't think you will. No, Dawson, until you can start waking up every day and thinking about yourself, I don't think you're ever gonna be able to... Be in a relationship and go to school and begin the life that you deserve to have.

Dawson: All right, mom, I plan on doing all those things. I just wanna make sure that you and lily are set first.

Gale: You are done. Right now. This is where it ends.

Dawson: Mom...

Gale: No. It's time. Look, I am probably more guilty than you know. I mean, there's part of me that has loved having you around, but it's just not fair, and it's just not right, and seeing you tonight with Jen, and realizing how much she wants you in Boston, it's made it all clear to me. I mean, the girl is... Head-over-heels smitten with you. She really cares about you and your future.

Dawson: I don't know how I would have gotten through all this without her.

Gale: Lily and I... We'll be ok. I promise. I'll hire some help around here if I need to. So, Dawson... Go to Boston. Live in that attic. You have been such a help to me in the past few months, I can't even begin to say thank you. I feel the same way about you that I know your father would. Honey, I'm proud of you.

Dawson: All right. I got some apologizing to do.

Gale: Yeah. You go in there and you tell her how you really feel about her. And if that doesn't work, grovel. It always worked like a charm for your dad.

Dawson: Good night.

[The Club, Audrey has just beaten Pacey again, and Pacey is getting ready to rack up the balls again.]

Pacey: Ok, one last game.

Audrey: All right. Loser has to pay the tab.

Pacey: Sure thin--hey, speaking of money, where's Joey?

Audrey: I don't know. She's been gone a long time.

Pacey: All right. Hang out here. I'm gonna go look for her.

Audrey: No, wait, wait, whoa! I'm coming with!

Pacey: Do you think it's possible she went home?

Audrey: I don't know. Maybe she met somebody. We sort of made this pact we were gonna kiss some boys tonight.

Pacey: Doesn't sound like a pact that Joey would make.

Audrey: Ok, well, I made it without her, but she was there.

Pacey: Audrey, listen to that! Listen!

Audrey: Oh my god! Are you hearing that, too?

[Girl singing, and up on stage they see Joey]

Pacey: I think so.

Audrey: No, it's not possible!

Pacey: Oh, it is possible. Check that out.

[Joey is up on stage sinning and takes off her coat and throws it to the side, and begins really getting into the song, singing, jumping and looking like a real rock singer in stage.]

Joey Singing: I'm begging you to beg me I want you to want me oh, my god!

Audrey: That can't be the same girl that sleeps in my room! Who is that girl?!

Pacey: That is "other Joey."

Audrey: Whoo! I can't believe it!

Joey Singing: I'll shine my own brown shoes I'll put on a brand-new shirt I'll make all my rhythm work if you say that you love me didn't I, didn't I, didn't I see you crying? Oh, didn't I, didn't I, didn't I see you crying? I feel that I'm alone without a friend you know, you feel like dying oh, didn't I, didn't I, didn't I see you crying? I want you to want me I need you to need me whoo! I love you to love me I'm begging you to beg me I want you to want me I want you to want me I want you to want me I want you to want me! Aah!

Audrey: Oh, my god!

[Applause]

[cat calls]

Audrey: Joey, you're my hero!

[Joey leaves through the back of the stage and stops laughing to herself about what she just did, when Charlie come off the stage to join her.]

Charlie: Whoo! Joey, that was amazing! Absolutely, positively amazing! I honestly had no idea you had that in you!

Joey: Then you probably don't know I have this, either.

[She grabs him and gives him a huge kiss.]

[Commercial Break]

[The club, behind the stage. We pick up where we left off from the kiss, and Joey pulls back away, and Charlie is still shocked.]

Joey: don't ever call me uptight!

[Audience screams]

[Dawson's Bedroom. Dawson comes into his room to see Jen standing by the window in her pajamas.]

Dawson: you are so beautiful.

Jen: Ok, apology accepted.

Dawson: Just like that? I had, like, a very impassioned speech.

Jen: Yeah, I don't really need it.

Dawson: I'm prepared to grovel.

Jen: Nope.

Dawson: Wow, I'm gonna have to remember that tact for the future.

Jen: You're right. Umm... I don't have any firsthand experience with what you're going through. Nearly no one I know does.

Dawson: And you're right. It's time I moved into that attic.

Jen: We can decorate!

[Jen looks out the window at grams' old house. Dawson comes up and wraps his arms around her from behind]

Jen: Mmm. God, it's so weird.

Dawson: What's that?

Jen: It's so weird how things work out. All those years living right next door to each other, but... We had to move away to a different city to get together. Mmm. Too bad we never got together over there.

Dawson: That would have been fun.

Jen: Well, you know what grams says: No regrets.

Dawson: Jen, I hate to break it to you, but that house does not belong to you anymore. Her house will always belong to me.

[The club. Audrey and Pacey are walking around looking for Joey.]

Pacey: I wonder where the little rock star wandered off to.

Audrey: Oh, maybe she went home.

Pacey: No, Joey wouldn't leave without telling me.

Audrey: Maybe she met someone.

Pacey: [Laughs] Joey potter, leave with a guy? Do you have any idea what it would take for that to happen?

Audrey: [Chuckling] Ohh. Um, I'm-- you know what? I totally forgot, but, um, before we left tonight, Joey said that she might have to go home early... To study.

Pacey: To study for what? She doesn't even have classes to study for.

Audrey: You know our Joey-- little miss perfect.

[They leave, without ever seeing Joey who is sitting on the stage, and Charlie walks up to join her.]

Charlie: You need a ride home.

Joey: I don't need anything.

Charlie: Unless you and the janitorial staff have some kind of unexpected bond. I think your friends have left. Come on. Let me give you a ride on my motorcycle. I'll take you anywhere you want to go. What? Making a fool out of myself again, huh?

Joey: No, of course you have a motorcycle.

Charlie: What's that supposed to mean?

Joey: Of course you don't understand.

Charlie: Hey, it's a Harley.

Joey: I'm sure it is.

[Inside Grams' old house. Jen and Dawson are wrapped naked together in a blanket by the fireplace. They have broken into the place and made love in front of the fireplace.]

Dawson: Jen, you think living under the same roof is gonna screw everything up?

Jen: Not if you quickly learn to deal with the toilet seat.

Dawson: I'll talk to jack.

Jen: Mmm, that sounds good. I've never really dated somebody that I knew and liked and trusted, so...

Dawson: Sounds like you got yourself in a healthy relationship.

Jen: Hmm. Sounds like it. So when do you think the fun stops in a healthy relationship?

Dawson: I have no idea. But I think we're gonna have a blast finding out.

[Outside the School Dorms. Pacey is dropping Audrey off outside her dorm room.]

Audrey: Thanks for the ride, Pacey. This is an awesome car. I really had fun tonight.

Pacey: Yeah, me, too.

Audrey: I mean, it's so much more fun hanging out with you than, like, some hot guy I'd want to date.

Pacey: Well, thanks, I think. You want me to walk you back to your dorm room?

Audrey: No, that's ok. All right. There's tons of security guards on campus during break. I'm totally safe. Fact, I bet Carlos is in the hall right now. [Gasps] wonder if his wife had the baby yet?

Pacey: Pretty chummy with the guys who work here over break for someone who just got back last night.

Audrey: Yeah. Well, that's me, you know. Chummy Audrey.

Pacey: Mmm. You never went home, did you?

Audrey: I really did get into a big fight with my parents about money. It was just a little bigger than I mentioned. Ok? It was a lot bigger. Uh, don't tell Joey, ok? I know it sounds kind of weird, but...Sometimes there are things that you don't even want the people who are close to you to know about.

Pacey: Heh. It doesn't sound weird to me. In fact, I may understand better than you think. 'Cause you see this beautiful piece of metal and machinery in front of you?

Audrey: Yes.

Pacey: This has sat in the police impound in Capeside for 3 months. And my father just gave it to me. 'Cause he said that he wanted someone who deserves it to have it. And he actually told me that he was proud of me. It's the first time in my entire life I have ever heard him say those words. He's proud of me.

Audrey: But?

Pacey: Even if it's true, how long could it possibly last? Well, I won't tell anyone.

Audrey: Ok.

Pacey: Ok. Parents are strange creatures.

Audrey: Heh heh. I know. From another planet, right?

Pacey: Good lord.

Audrey: Hey, Pacey...

Pacey: What was that for?

Audrey: The pact that Joey and I made. I know she's not gonna do it. I figure one of us should. I hope you don't mind.

Pacey: Rarely do I mind being kissed by a beautiful woman.

Audrey: Ok. Well, I will see you at work tomorrow.

Pacey: Yes, indeed.

Audrey: You know what? I look forward to it.

Pacey: Yeah. Excellent.

[Car engine starts]

[A street on the way home from the Club. Joey is walking alone, when Charlie come up to her on his motorcycle.]

Charlie: hey, come on. Let me give you a ride.

Joey: I prefer to walk.

Charlie: You're gonna walk all the way home in this cold?

Joey: Sure.

Charlie: Wouldn't you rather take a ride someplace? Someplace warm? Hey, come on. I know there's a part of you just dying to get on this bike and ride off with me. If there isn't... Then what was that kiss back there all about?

Joey: Ok. Maybe... Just maybe there is another part of me, another girl that lives deep inside of me, and maybe every once in a while she lets loose and does things that might blow some people's minds. But, Charlie... If you ever mention her or anything she might have done tonight to another person... I'll completely deny knowing anything about her.

Charlie: It was fun hanging out with you for a night, Joey. The smart girl from Worthington.

Joey: Good night, Charlie.

[Motorcycle engine starts]