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  06x14 - Clean and Sober
 Posted: 02/23/03 00:54
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Episode 614 - Clean and Sober

In this episode: When Dawson visits Audrey at rehab, he spots a big time producer and follows her into a therapy session. Meanwhile, Pacey throws a party to celebrate his new success and is surprised when Joey lets loose during a spontaneous game of spin the bottle; Jen catches reformed alcoholic C.J. with a drink; and Jack agrees to marry Emma so that she can get her green card.

Original Airdate: February 5, 2003

[Scene: The Electronics' Store. Pacey and Jack are staring at something off screen, and practically drooling while Joey is standing behind them shaking her head]

Pacey: [Sniffles] My god, she is gorgeous.

Jack: Even I can appreciate that.

Pacey: [Sighs] And this one, she knows how to turn on the fun. You know what I mean?

Jack: Can you afford her?

Pacey: Please, Jack, do not tarnish this moment with talk of money.

Jack: I'm just saying—

Pacey: I must have her, therefore I can afford her. Her... and all of her little toys, too.

[Camera pulls back showing us that they are staring at a large screen TV]

Pacey: [Breathes deeply]

Joey: What are you guys even gonna do with something this big? I mean, it's kind of grotesque, not to mention the fact that Emma's gonna freak out when you drag this through the living room.

Pacey: Joey, don't be jealous just because she can do things that no man has ever known before.

Joey: Ok, now you're disturbing me. It's a television that looks like it ate a small country. This is the most blatant display of capitalism I've ever seen.

Jack: Don't be threatened by something you don't understand, Joey. I'm gonna go get the sales guy.

[Jack seeing Pacey staring at the screen and nodding runs off to get the sales person]

Joey: Aren't there better things you can be doing with your money?

Pacey: What, like funding your drug habit?

Joey: Now we're talking. Gratuitous purchases aside, I'm very impressed with you, Pace.

Pacey: Hey, you put any fool in a suit and he can change the world. Just look at trading places.

Joey: It's not the suits, and it's not the high-tech toys. It's how you got yourself to this place. I mean, look how far you've come.

Pacey: Not too far, I hope.

Joey: Are you really worried about that?

Pacey: Of course. I'd like to think that I could get back to being the person I used to be, because, in my opinion, he was actually a pretty good guy.

Joey: You still are, Pacey. , You've always been this madcap genius just waiting for potential to kick in. It just so happened to kick into overdrive. I'm very proud of you.

Pacey: Thank you. That means a lot coming from you, Jo.

Joey: But... if you think I'm gonna sit in your apartment and pay homage to that thing, you're sorely mistaken.

Pacey: You gotta come tonight. It's not a party without you, you know that.

Joey: I know. Believe me, I'm coming. I mean, I'm in dire need of cheer and libations after Eddie up and decided to make something of himself.

Pacey: Yeah, you gotta quit with the whole supportive and inspirational thing. It doesn't work for ya. I mean, seriously, what's up with that? Now don't make me regret all of my sentimental pride.

Joey: I won't.

Pacey: So long as you come tonight. It'll be good for your soul, and it really would mean a lot to me if you could just accept her... [Looks back at the TV] As one of our own.

Joey: Oh, god. Clothes don't fool me. Same old lovable punk. I'm gonna go check out the iPods.

[Opening Credits]

[Commercial Break]

[Scene: Pacey's Apartment. The TV is being delivered and Pacey is showing them where to put it. Jack and Jen are there to see the great unveiling]

Jack: Back wall, guys.

Pacey: Back Here. Back here. Back here. [Directing the delivery guys]

Jack: Ohhh. She is awesome. We're gonna pray to her every night.

Jen: It's a box, jack. It's a big box, and since when have you been so interested in big boxes?

Jack: Since Pacey here started sharing the wealth.

Jen: This is not gonna bring you happiness, you know.

Jack: Oh, I beg to differ. See, David's here right now to check out the TV.

Jen: Oh, so, what, you're gonna get lucky with the television?

[David comes into the apartment and walks over to join them by the TV]

Jen: Hi.

David: Hey.

Jack: Hey.

David: Holy big-screen, batman. You were right. It is beautiful.

Jen: Have you boys no concern for the general aesthetic quality of your surroundings? This thing is so big, it could block the sun.

Pacey: Spare me the manifesto, Lindley. The quality of life just went up 10 points in here. Would ya just... give the old girl a chance? I'm sure that she will impress you with her skills. The--the strength of the sound that comes from her, it just-- it feels like it's enveloping your whole body.

Jen: Oh, is Emma's band playing tonight? I didn't know that.

Pacey: No. The TV. Love the TV. Touch the TV.

Jen: Ahh. Moving on. Next subject. Why are you having this party anyway? I mean, you and jack have been living here in private squalor for months now.

Pacey: Squalor. Interesting. Well, work's been going well, and, uh, I just wanted to spread the joy.

Jen: So, listen, I'm bringing C.J. To this party.

Pacey: [Sighs] C.J., The dude from the concert.

Jen: Yes, C.J., The dude from the concert, whose face you introduced to the brick wall, which leads me to my next point-- could you possibly not punch him tonight?

Pacey: I would never.

Jen: Well, that's reassuring. Um, but I'm gonna go now, and when I return, I will have C.J., And I will have ice. Ice, which is for drinks, not for boys' broken faces.

Pacey: Thanks for the clarification.

[Jen, leaves and runs into Emma and some guy walking into the apartment.]

Jen: Hey. See ya later tonight.

Emma: Ta.

Pacey: Emma.

Emma: [Laughs] Oh, what in the queen's name is that?

Pacey: That is tonight's entertainment and every glorious night thereafter.

Jack: This is bertha. Isn't she pretty?

Emma: No. She is not pretty. She is an oversized hag who's taking up my practice space.

Pacey: Don't talk about bertha like that. We can discuss rearranging later.

[Jack looks at the very unkempt person that came into the apartment with Emma and is standing in the kitchen.]

Jack: What--what-- what in the queen's name is that?

Emma: [Laughs] Oh. Sorry. Um... that's Gus.

Jack: Oh.

Emma: My fiancé.

[Everyone suddenly stops what they were doing and looks at her and then to Gus. Who belches.]

[Scene: The rehab center. Dawson walks in and goes over to the receptionist desk. The receptionist looks up from her clipboard to see is she can help him]

Receptionist: How can you help yourself today?

Dawson: Ha ha. Um, actually I'm here to—

[Audrey sees Dawson and runs over to greet him]

Audrey: Dawson leery, you are a sight for sober eyes. Hi!

Dawson: It's good to see you, too.

Audrey: Oh, I thought you were gonna think my message was a joke.

Dawson: You sounded a little too desperate for it to be a joke.

Audrey: Oh, well, thanks for not flaking, 'cause I kinda woulda deserved that. [she begins to fake sneeze] Ah-choo! Ah-choo! Ah-choo! Oh, but please tell me that you brought me some Nyquil 'cause I can just not shake this pesky cold.

Receptionist: The first step to getting better is allowing yourself to admit that you're sick.

Audrey: Thanks, Betty. Ok, well, it's cool that you forgot the Nyquil, we'll deal with that later, but please, for the love of Joey Potter, tell me that you brought me something to read. A Jane magazine, hell, I'd even settle for Martha anything. Anything but the bible, although it was pretty cool the first time around. People steal a lot of material from the bible. Have you ever noticed that?

[They quickly make their way to a poolside at the rehab center to talk]

Dawson: Are you ok, Audrey?

Audrey: Yeah. You know, truth be told, I've been...smoking a lot more than the average girl, well, more than the average girl without an eating disorder. You know, they kind of encourage that here. 'cause, like, that's not gonna kill you or anything. Anyway...bygones. You ok, Dawson?

Dawson: Uh, well, sorta. I've been living in Todd's guesthouse for the past 2 weeks, which has been its own kind of sobriety nightmare. Uh, wicked dead is going straight to cable, which means Todd won't be directing anything in the near future and I probably won't ever get another shot at this rate.

Audrey: Yeah. I'm in rehab, Dawson.

Dawson: [Laughs]

Audrey: Did you really not bring me any magazines?

Dawson: I'm sorry, I—

[Dawson looks over and sees someone he recognizes trying to get a soda out of the machine but it is not cooperating.]

Dawson: Do you know who that is?

Audrey: Yeah. It's the broad I lost my cigarettes to last night in poker game. I really don't want to talk about it.

Dawson: That's Toni Stark. She's a phenomenally successful producer. She used to work for Spielberg's production company, then she left to start her own. She's like a modern Hollywood legend.

Audrey: Oh, well, finding those is like shooting fish in a barrel here, so don't blow your wad on one sighting, ok, tiger?

Dawson: Do you-- I mean, do you think I could like talk to her? I mean--I mean, I'd love to talk to her, but I don't-- I don't know. She's got this reputation for being like a renowned harpy. You know, likes to eat well-meaning types for breakfast.

Audrey: Well, that's probably her drunken reputation. I mean, she's got no ammo here, but, hello, what about me? You know, you're like the only person who's been cool enough to come visit me here, and now you're gonna ditch me?

Dawson: I'm sorry. You're right. You're absolutely right. Let's-- let's work through what got you here in the first place.

Audrey: No. Let's stalk the burn-out.

[Scene: Outside Pacey, Jack and Emma's apartment. CJ and Jen come walking up to the door carrying some bags of ice, when CJ starts to get nervous]

CJ: Whose party did you say this was?

Jen: I didn't. Funny, that. Let's go in.

CJ: Wait. Wait. Wait. Wait. Come on now. I'm not one for surprises.

Jen: Ok, it's my friend Pacey's party.

CJ: Pa--that dude from the concert?

Jen: Yes, the dude from the concert, the one who introduced your face to a brick wall.

CJ: I got a better idea. Why don't we go in there, drop off the ice, go to a movie.

Jen: These are some of my best friends, and if you and I are gonna do this, you're gonna have to get to know them sooner or later, so let's just do it, please?

[They go inside the apartment and the first thing you see is a lot of people and a very large TV]

Emma: Hello there.

CJ: Nice television.

Jen: See? I told you it wasn't gonna be so bad.

[They take off their coats and make their way into the party.]

[Scene: In the Kitchen. Joey and Pacey are in the kitchen talking together about the party. Joey is filling up a bowl with chips as Pacey is raiding the refrigerator]

Joey: Quite the shindig, pace. I'm impressed.

Pacey: Why, thank you. I owe it all to bertha.

Joey: Please tell me you didn't name the television.

Pacey: Ok. You want a drink? We have... water, juice, coke, the green gunk that Emma drinks, beer—

Pacey: Mm, gimme a drink. Something fruity and mind-numbing.

[Pacey looks Shocked]

Joey: Don't gimme that look.

Pacey: What look?

Joey: Like you're going to ask me who I am and what I've done to Joey Potter.

[He pulls out some orange juice and cranberry juice, and grabs the vodka and begins mixing Joey a drink]

Pacey: I was gonna do no such thing. I was simply gonna make you a drink. And may I say that you look wonderful tonight.

Joey: Thank you. I thought it was time for a shower.

Pacey: [Laughs] You know, I heard that things haven't been going so great for you lately, but I have confidence that you're gonna get through this because you always do.

Joey: Hmm. You know, I'll always be the one to wake up early, take the exam, get over the boy, drive the roommate to rehab, right? 'Cause somebody's gotta do all that, right? You know what? Maybe tomorrow I won't do it and somebody else will.

Pacey: So just what would you do instead?

Joey: What is this instead you speak of?

Pacey: Well... this is a fairly safe place for you, right? So feel free. Enjoy yourself.

Joey: All right. That's the plan. All bets are off.

[She grabs the bottle of vodka and pours more into her drink]

[Commercial Break]

[Scene: The couch in front of the big TV. Joey is obviously starting to get drunk, and she is sitting on the couch talking with David.]

Joey: [ Laughing ] You know, I just keep wondering... when he's gonna return to his art. I mean, he was really quite talented.

David: Mm-hmm. Really? I had no idea he was into that sort of thing.

Joey: Mm-hmm.

David: Really?

Joey: Oh, my gosh. That's what brought us together in the first place. Well... before. I mean, you'll think this is funny, but... jack... when I first met him... mm-hmm. He was... shy and kinda dorky. Seriously. [Laughs] I mean, to be honest, I never would've known he liked me, except for... there was that one time I was sketching him for class... he got excited. Waaaaah.

David: No.

Joey: [Laughing]

[Scene: The rehab center. Audrey and Dawson are stalking the producer, and see her go over and sit down at a small table outside, and grab a magazine.]

Audrey: Ooh, Dawson, go do it now.

Dawson: Do what? I don't remember coming up with a plan.

Audrey: Just friggin' go do it!

[Audrey shoved him over towards her, and he shyly makes his way over to talk to her.]

Dawson: Slim pickin's, huh?

Toni: Entertainment's sure tough to come by around here. What do you do for fun?

Dawson: Me? I just got here.

Toni: Well, I'd be glad to show you the ropes, um...

Dawson: Dawson. Dawson Leery.

[She shakes his hand and then doesn't release it, rather she begins to caress it with her other hand.]

Toni: You got nice hands, Dawson Leery. I'm Toni Stark.

Dawson: I know who you are. You're...a genius.

Toni: Yeah. Something like that.

Dawson: I'm sorry. You probably came here for privacy.

Toni: No. Actually I came here to stop having fun, but I love hearing how great I was... 10 years ago. You put it that way, you sound like you were a flash in the pan.

Dawson: So are we gonna go somewhere or what?

Toni: Um... [Laughs] I...uh, I'm sorry. Look, the thing is I'm starting out in the industry—

Dawson: Listen, baby bird, it's bad enough teasing a drying-out broad with your naughty bits, but it's worse to try and talk about the business with somebody who's currently out of it. See ya around.

[Toni leaves, and Audrey comes walking up trying to contain her laughter, but is failing miserably.]

Audrey: [Laughs] Oh, my god. Dawson!

Dawson: [Sighs]

Audrey: You are helpless

[Scene: The Apartment Kitchen. Jen is looking through the refrigerator, when David comes walking up behind her and reaches in and grabs a drink.]

David: Hey, hope you're not looking for anything of nutritional value.

Jen: No. No. [Sighs] No. No. Just lookin'. So it's a good party, huh? I think it's a good party. All these different types of people mixing and what not, and—and there's been no punching in of C.J.'S face. That's good. I like that.

David: You seem a little jumpy. Do you, uh, want a beer or something?

Jen: No, I'm goin' the clean and sober route tonight, takin' one for the C.J. Team.

David: He doesn't mind it when other people drink.

Jen: It's nothing. It's just easier this way.

David: What, lying?

Jen: No, it's not lying, I mean, it's just--it's-- and you know what, and it's probably really good for me, too.

[Pacey comes up and reaches over them to grab a beer out of the door of the refrigerator]

Pacey: Hey.

Jen: Hi. How are ya, slugger?

Pacey: Don't worry. Everything's fine.

Jen: Yeah, I noticed the lack of fisticuffs. Thank you for being nice to him.

Pacey: It's actually easier than I thought it would be 'cause it turns out he's a pretty good guy. So we kissed, we made up, I offered him a drink, and everything's been ok.

Jen: He refused, right, when you offered him the drink?

Pacey: No, of course not. Who does that?

Jen: Oh, god. Alcoholics. Recovering alcoholics tend not to drink.

Pacey: What's with all the under-age alcoholics around here? Ok. I got it. I'm on damage control, and have you seen Joey?

[Scene: Elsewhere at the party. Joey and CJ are leaning against a wall talking to one another. Joey is drunkenly rambling on again, rather than a full out conversation.]

Joey: You know, C.J. I just--I really think it's great how you've turned Jen around. Because before, believe me, I mean, she was-- she was a troubled young lady.

CJ: So she says.

Joey: She killed a girl once.

CJ: What?

Joey: Abby Morgan. Killed her with champagne. You want some?

[She holds up her glass of champagne to him]

CJ: No.

Joey: Do you want some?

CJ: No. No. I'm--I'm-- this is--I'm-- oooh.

[Pacey seeing her trying to push alcohol on him quickly intervenes]

Pacey: [Laughs] Hey, there you are. So... what do you say we leave the nice man alone now, shall we?

[Pacey grabs her drink, and then pulls Joey next to him]

Pacey: About that thing earlier, I'm sorry, I didn't know.

CJ: What?

[Scene: In another room. Possibly where Emma Sleeps. Joey and Pacey enter the room and take a seat on the bed trying to get away from the crowd for a minute]

Joey: Thank you.

Pacey: You're welcome.

[She takes here drink back and sits down]

Joey: He seems like a nice guy. What does C.J. Stand for?

Pacey: Couldn't tell ya.

Joey: Ah, I hope those kids work it out.

Pacey: Hmm.

Joey: Pacey. Everybody's working it out. Jen and C.J., You know, that British girl and that gross guy. I'm just no good at this. I just-- I push people away.

Pacey: No, that's not true.

Joey: Oh, no? Then why do they go out to sea or move across country or follow their dreams just because I told them to? There's always something better out there than me.

[Begins to get a tear in her eye]

Pacey: Whoa. I think, perhaps you're looking at this the wrong way. Maybe it's just that you're such an amazing woman, you make these guys wanna be better men.

Joey: Well, we're not together.

Pacey: True enough. [Chuckles] Yeah. [Sighs] Yeah.

Joey: Well, don't you look so glum. We're talking about my sucky life. Yours is a success.

[She tries to push his mouth into a smile with her fingers]

Joey: Oh. I forgot. You're still not over me.

Pacey: [Chuckles] Really?

Joey: Oh, remember? Christmas dinner from hell? That was one of Audrey's enlightened comments.

Pacey: Right. Of course.

Joey: You're still not over me. That must suck.

Pacey: Oh, it does. You have no idea the hardships I go through trying to maintain a friendship with a dream girl such as yourself. You have no idea.

Joey: Gets lonely.

Pacey: It does. I cry myself to sleep every night, but Jack and I cuddle. That eases the pain. He's very loving.

Joey: [Laughs] Oh, Pace. You know what? I am a good catch.

[She gets up and walks out of the room, and Pacey just watches her go, agreeing to himself.]

[Commercial Break]

[Scene: A montage of scenes from the party. Including all of the character of the show doing many different thing. CJ and Jen talking. Gus trying to hit on Emma but her pulling away. Joey drinking. Jack and David talking. Pacey and others. Many people around a keg. More Joey drinking. Pacey and Joey having a great time together.]

[Scene: The couch in front of the TV. Jack, Emma and Gus are sitting on the couch talking together. Gus on one end, Jack on the other, and Emma in the middle of them.]

Jack: I--I don't understand. I mean, when did you stop going to school?

Emma: Um... the end of the semester. The band's really taking off, jack, and I just-- I couldn't keep up with the requirements. When am I gonna need to know the origin of the baroque period anyway? It's totally lacking inspiration.

Gus: Totally.

Jack: Ahem. So, Gus... you still in school?

Gus: No need. I'm gonna be a roadie for the little lady.

Emma: [Laughs] No. No. He's just saying that. No. He's actually, um, a very brilliant pianist. He, um, plays in a pool hall on--on Thursday nights. It's really good stuff.

[They look over to Gus who is pulling something off the bottom of his shoe]

Gus: Wicked.

Jack: Yeah. Ok, um... are you sure you thought this marriage thing through? I mean, no offense, Gus, we just met tonight, but uh, it's movin' awful quickly.

Emma: Yeah, that's sort of the point, Jack. My visa ran out as soon as I quit school, which means I have no right to be here unless I... marry some Yankee bastard. Actually Gus has been very agreeable about the whole thing. Haven't ya, Gus?

Gus: Right on, baby mama.

Emma: So I'm going to go, um, fetch something to drink. Can I get something for anyone?

Gus: Yeah, I'd like a-- I'd like a beer.

Emma: Ok.

Gus: And maybe some chips. And maybe, uh... mash the chips up inside a sandwich.

Emma: Ok.

[Emma goes into the kitchen leaving them alone]

Jack: So... Gus, did ya just, you know, offer your services to her, 'cause, you know, it's a big sacrifice just, you know, gettin' married this young and all. So—

Gus: Yeah, I was led to believe that having other women in the bedroom wouldn't exactly be off limits. Plus, it's nice compensation.

Jack: What do you mean?

Gus: Free room and board, man. Plus, she said she'd cook for me.

Jack: Uh... yeah, you know, she's not exactly a cook. Um... she just throws stuff in a blender, and then she just kinda hopes—

Gus: Whatever, man. She's got a nice rack.

Jack: Yeah, she—

[Emma comes back and hands Gus a sandwich and a beer.]

Emma: Say, uh, are you two getting to know each other?

Jack: Unfortunately.

Gus: Yeah, no, your old man's cool. Doesn't even seem all that gay.

[Jack looks at him angrily for a sec, then decides not to do anything. Emma takes a big drink out of the bottle of champagne she has]

Jack: Yeah. Ok. Um... see you kids later. I'm just going to—

[Jack goes to get up, but Emma grabs his shoulder and forces his to sit back down]

Jack: Stay right here.

[The camera pulls away, but Emma never lets go of Jack's shoulder preventing him from leaving.]

[Scene: The rehab center. Dawson and Audrey are following Toni Stark down the hallways at a distance that she cannot easily see them]

Dawson: All right, wait, why are we still doing this? Weren't you just blatantly telling me what a miserable failure I was?

Audrey: Look, Dawson Leery, if there is one thing I have learned in rehab, well, other than some killer cat's cradle, is that you have to believe in yourself. You are your own worst enemy and all that.

Dawson: You're not too convincing.

Audrey: [Sighs] Come on. You are so much better than all the wannabes I grew up with. I mean, so you made a colossal fool out of yourself in front of some producer. I say... why not do it again?

Dawson: You're not just encouraging me because you've been in rehab for a month and you're bored out of your mind, are you?

Audrey: Dawson, give a girl a break and dance, monkey, dance!

[Toni turns and walks around a corner out of view]

Dawson: All right, she went in that room right there.

Audrey: Oooh.

[The quickly turn the corner to see that they have walked in on a group session.]

Counselor: Hey, guys. Come on in. Don't be shy. We're here to help.

Dawson: Actually, you know, we're …

Audrey: No, you know what? Honey, this is gonna be good for us.

Counselor: Come on, guys, make some room.

[Two people give them their char and grab another from the side of the room]

Dawson: Thank you.

Audrey: Thanks.

[Scene: The party. There is another montage of people having a great time together. Emma runs up to the Keg and does a handstand on it while two guys hold her legs and another begins to pour beer from the tap into her mouth. Jack and Pacey are standing next to the new TV watching this go on.]

Jack: Do we really have to co-habitat with this guy?

Pacey: Whoa. Whoa. She didn't mention anything about that.

[One of the guys were counting and gets to ten, and Emma falls back down to the ground]

Jack: Well, yeah, I think it's part of the marital-bliss deal. I mean, free room and board, the occasional unwanted groping, it's the only reason he's doing it.

Pacey: You gotta be kidding me.

Jack: What, you're shocked?

Pacey: I--I--I just don't get it, I guess.

Jack: I mean, you know, I understand Emma's in a bind, but, you know, she coulda said something.

Pacey: Yeah, I know.

Jack: And this creep. I mean, who marries someone they don't love?

[They both look over and see Gus slap Emma on the ass as she walks by.]

Pacey: That kinda creep.

Jack: Kinda creep that's kinda givin' up hope.

Pacey: When you stop to think about it, it really must suck to be him.

[Scene: in one of the other rooms of the apartment. Jen walks into the room, and sees CJ sitting in a window sill holding a drink in his hands.]

Jen: So you havin' fun?

CJ: Oh, yeah.

Jen: Yeah. So you're drinking?

CJ: You know, I'd be much more inclined to answer your question if you weren't lookin' at me like I just...killed grams drunk driving.

Jen: I'm just curious.

CJ: Well, your friend offered me a drink, and it seemed rude to say no, so—

Jen: So that's it? Years of sobriety shot to hell over a question of etiquette with a guy who threatened to punch you in your face?

CJ: I don't expect you to understand.

Jen: Well, thank god for that.

CJ: No, I just-- I didn't want to get into it with a stranger. You know... but thanks for telling him, incidentally.

Jen: Telling him what?

CJ: That I don't drink, apparently. Now he's apologizing to me like I'm dying or something.

Jen: Well, you know, it is a disease.

CJ: I know that, Jen. I, uh, I trained you. Remember?

Jen: Y-yeah, no, I know. I know, so why is this coming up? Because for as long as I've known you, you've operated on a certain set of rules to the point where I didn't think that a day would go by if you weren't sticking to the C.J. Plan.

CJ: Well, did it ever occur to you that maybe I realized I was too strict with myself? That maybe I wouldn't even be here right now if I was sticking to the so-called C.J. Plan?

Jen: Well, if this is gonna happen, then maybe you shouldn't be here with me.

CJ: Why? Because I've been sitting here for the past hour considering on whether or not to take a drink? I'd be more concerned about your friend Joey over there. She tried to tell me you killed somebody.

Jen: Wait, I'm sorry, so you--you haven't been drinking?

CJ: Oh, is that gonna magically change all the conclusions you just jumped to?

Jen: Well, yes.

CJ: Well, it doesn't work that way, Jen. Yeah, I've been thinking about it, fine. Just like I've been thinking about trying some normalcy with you, but apparently you find that wildly insulting.

Jen: No. No, look, I just don't want-- I just don't want whatever happens between us to be detrimental to either of us.

CJ: Are you trying to get outta something here? If you are, just tell me.

Jen: No, I am not trying to get out of anything. I don't even know what I'm getting into.

CJ: Well, then why are you making excuses for why this won't work? I mean, it's pretty hypocritical given our history, isn't it?

[Scene: The rehab center. Audrey and Dawson are sitting in the group session. Dawson seems out of place, but Audrey looks like she is trying to make the best of the situation.]

Counselor: What's your name?

Audrey: [Southern accent] My name is pinky. They call me that because a ferret bit off my pinky toe when I was 10, and that is when I turned to the drink.

Counselor: Ok. What is it that you'd like to tell your friend here?

Audrey: Oh, he is more than just a friend, more than just a cousin. We got married real young. Right after the second baby, was it? And then there were some more, but I lost track. They're with mom now in Vegas, but Dawson here, he was always real good to me. Even when I beat him because he knew that I didn't mean it. He knew it was just the alcohol talkin', right?

Dawson: You did do some things that were more violent than that.

Audrey: Well, like what, honey?

Dawson: Well, how 'bout the time you drove the car through the house and damn near killed us all?

Audrey: He's right about the car. Yeah. There were some things that I did that I probably wouldn't have if I weren't drinkin'.

Counselor: What other things, fingy?

Audrey: Well... like tellin' people things they didn't need to hear just 'cause I wanted to see the looks on their faces. You know, pushin' people away who were just tryin' to help me. Dawson here, he was always... real quiet about it, though. Not judgmental, really, just, you know, kept pickin' me up over and over again.

Counselor: And why do you suppose he did that?

Audrey: I don't really know. I think he's just... the kinda guy who always believes the best in people. And he deserved more than just... the destruction of his property, I suppose.

Dawson: It's ok, though. We can fix that.

Audrey: [Whispering] But I could've really hurt you.

Dawson: Yeah, but I think you needed to hit rock bottom before you snapped out of it.

Audrey: Yeah, but I didn't hit rock bottom until a couple of weeks after that.

Dawson: Maybe you just needed to hit it really hard.

Audrey: [Laughing] [Southern accent] Do you think... that there is still a house for me to come home to after all the construction's done and what not?

Dawson: I promise.

Audrey: Oh! Dawson, let's have another baby.

Toni: [Applause] Listen, I'm all for makin' a mockery of rehab, but can we please move this along? Blondie over here is from Beverly Hills, and she tried to take me for 2 packs last night, and her boyfriend here is, I don't know, a key grip.

Counselor: Is this true?

Dawson: Actually I was assistant to the director. I ended up directing the re-shoots myself, and, Toni, if you'd allow me to show you my reel—

Counselor: Ok, that'll be quite enough of that. Thank you very much. You two obviously don't belong here.

Audrey: [Gasps] Do you mean I'm cured?

Counselor: No, I mean you're on dish duty tonight. I'll tell betty. Now, please, let conduct this session in peace.

Audrey: Sorry.

Toni: Buh-bye now.

[They get up and leave]

Audrey: It went well.

[Scene: The Party. Joey has gotten, Pacey, Jen and CJ, David and Jack, Emma and Gus all together to play spin the bottle. Everyone except Joey rather not be playing this game.]

Jen: You killing me with this, right, Joey?

Joey: I most certainly am not. Now don't be a spoil sport. Come on.

Jen: Ok, fine, but I--I'm not kissing him.

[points at Gus]

Joey: Well, what's fair is fair, right? Come on, Gustav, spin.

[Gus spins the bottle and it ends up pointing at Joey.]

Joey: New rule-- no tongue.

Jen: No, no, no, no. What's fair is fair, and don't mess with me because I've killed before.

Joey: [Whispering] I know. [to CJ] See?

Gus: No tongue? Screw that.

[Gus gets up and goes over and licks the side of Joey's Cheek. He sits back down and Joey wipes her face with her sleeve, and everyone looks disgusted.]

Joey: Ok. Well?

[She spins the bottle and it ends on Jack]

Joey: Jack!

[They kiss, and then Jack spins the bottle and it ends on Emma, and Jack kisses Emma. Emma spins the bottle and it ends on Jen.]

Jen: Oh.

[Jen and Emma give each other a quick kiss after a little giggle. Jen spins the bottle and it ends on CJ.]

Joey: Wait. That's not fair. You guys get to kiss all the time. What's the fun in that?

CJ: Not tonight. There's rules to be followed, yeah?

Jen: Oh, shut up.

[They kiss rather passionately, and Jack just sits impatiently. Everyone stares as they begin to make out right there. ]

David: Ok.

Jack: Ugh, yeah.

CJ: I'm a little thirsty. Do you need a—

Jen: ok. Yeah, let's.

[Jen and CJ quickly get up and leave them.]

Joey: Oh, hey, whoa. This isn't like... 7 minutes in heaven. You guys have to come back.

Jack: You just wanna kiss Jen.

Pacey: Ok, regardless, they forfeit their turn.

[He gets up and spins the bottle, and it lands on Joey. Who smiles]

Joey: Mmm. Well... [Drunkenly trying to act sexy]doo-doo doo-doo all right. [Whispering] Lay one on me, pace.

[Just as Pacey is about to kiss Joey, Gus who is standing on the new TV falls]

Gus: Oh!


Pacey: Oh, you're gonna die!

Gus: I just-- I just wanted to see how much weight it would hold.

Pacey: What have you done?!

Gus: I didn't—

Pacey: What have you done?! I will kill you. I will kill you for this do you understand?!

[Emma quickly sees that Pacey is serious and quickly gets Pacey to release Gus and stands between them]

Emma: Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Aaaah!

[She pops Gus upside the head with her hand]

Emma: Idiot! Don't worry about this. I'll take care of it.

Pacey: No! No! No! Kill you!

[Emma pushes Gus towards the door to the apartment]

What about my stuff?

Emma: Oh, I'll throw it on the curb.

Gus: Yeah. Ok, but—

Emma: the wedding is off.

Gus: Um, we-- we haven't done it yet.

Emma: Yeah, I'm aware of that, thank you.

Gus: Ok.

[She pushes him out the door, and Pacey and Jack lift the TV back up and see the screen is smashed]

Pacey: Oh, bertha. [Crying]

Jack: Oh, no. Jeez!

[Electrical snaps]

Pacey: Oh, I'm gonna kill that little bastard.

[Joey stands up, rather drunk, not knowing what is going on.]

Joey: Wanna play sardines?

[she passes out and falls to the floor.]

[Commercial Break]

[Scene: Outside the Rehab Center. Audrey is walking Dawson out to his car. It is now evening out. ]

Dawson: So they're really gonna put you on dish duty, huh?

Audrey: Oh, please, that's a godsend. It gets me out of kumbaya-ing for the night.

Dawson: Well, why did you have to give us so many kids?

Audrey: Whatever! Why did you have to get all earnest with the bag lady about the nature of the biz? [Laughs] Ohh. [Sighs] You know, it wasn't entirely fictional, the therapy session. I was feeling like there was some hardcore healing going on in there.

Dawson: Good. Just sucks you had to get in trouble to do it.

Audrey: Dawson. Stalking some woman through the hallways and crashing a therapy session was more fun than I ever could've imagined. You have no idea what a relief it was to just... not talk about myself and my problems all day. And darned if it didn't end up helping my problems out anyway.

Dawson: Hate when that happens.

Audrey: I know. You seem a little less self-absorbed than when you got here. You better get yourself back to L.A. Proper fast.

Dawson: Yeah, really. I don't know, I think it was just seeing somebody I admire so much give up on life like that. I don't know, I might be floundering for my next move, but I'm not that bad.

Audrey: Dawson, I haven't given up on life.

Dawson: I'm talking about Toni Stark.

Audrey: Oh. Right. [Giggles] See? You're good. The next time you come, you bring me Nyquil.

Dawson: There doesn't even have to be a next time. You're almost outta here.

Audrey: I don't know, it's like... as much as I hate it here, I'm sorta scared more of what's beyond the gate 'cause it's all kind of a blur, but... I don't think I left things on the best of terms out there.

Dawson: It can all be just like it was. Minus the bad parts.

Audrey: You know, actually, I kinda don't think I can, but... kinda glad about that. [Giggles]

Dawson: Come here.

[They hug.]

Audrey: [Sighs] Thank you.

Dawson: Bye.

Audrey: See ya.

[Scene: the couch in front of the now busted TV. David and Jack are sitting there looking at the broken TV and talking.]

David: So, uh, you really used to go out with, uh, Joey, huh?

Jack: Uh...ahem. Who have you been talking to tonight?

David: Well, maybe if you didn't keep ditching me to go make out with women—

Jack: I was just playing by the rules. Besides, Joey was being very...adamant. What exactly did she tell you?

David: Nothing, really, but I would love to see your work sometime.

Jack: [Laughs] Ooh, no, I don't-- I don't-- I don't think so. Ahem. But I am sorry for being, uh, distracted tonight. It's just that, you know, this whole... Gus bomb that, uh, Emma dropped is just kinda shocking.

David: Yeah, but crisis averted. It's almost like it never happened.

Jack: Well, I'm just worried. You know, I mean, I just--I had no idea that things were so desperate for her. What's she gonna do now?

David: Hmm. It's a bad situation, you know, it isn't exactly your problem to solve. I mean, there isn't really much you can do unless you want to go marry her yourself. [Chuckles]

[We can see that Jack is actually considering the thought]

[Scene: Pacey's Bedroom. Jen and CJ have just had sex, and are lying underneath all of the coats that are piled up on the bed. CJ grabs his boxers and is about to start to get dressed when Jen stops him.]

Jen: Wait. What are you doing? Are you getting dressed?

CJ: Well, yeah. I think some people wanna get in here.

Jen: Don't. Make them wait. Their coats aren't that nice anyway.

CJ: Well, you're the one rollin' around in 'em.

Jen: I know. Exactly. Come here.

CJ: Ok.

[They begins kissing again]

CJ: This sure beats arguing about whether or not I've had a drink.

Jen: No, that was fun for a while, too.

CJ: Well, you weren't entirely wrong.

Jen: Yeah, well, I wasn't entirely right, either. I mean... it's your life, you know what you're doing with it.

CJ: Not really. But this is pretty nice right here. I got nervous tonight... when I saw... Pacey. Reminded me of all the--the drama. I don't know, I just-- I guess I just wanted to make you happy, try to be normal.

Jen: I would be unhappy if you were normal. Besides, I thought that's what I was trying to do. I had this plan that I was not going to have a drink tonight, and you and I were just going to talk about philosophy.

CJ: That's not normal party behavior.

Jen: I don't care about any of that stuff anymore. I mean, I just this. Can--can we do this?

CJ: This? Think we just did, and I think some coat owners aren't gonna be too happy with the result.

Jen: Seriously, I-- I don't wanna date the idea of you, and I don't want you to fall for some false idea of me.

CJ: You tried faking me out before, remember? You're not very good at it.

Jen: I know. We should get outta here.

CJ: You're gonna have to surrender this coat first, you know that?

Jen: No, this is Joey's coat. She has enough coats.

[He points to the coat that Jen is lying underneath]

CJ: Come on, let's go get wasted.

Jen: Mmm. Totally, dude.

[He gets up, but Jen lies there for a sec holding Joey's coat to her]

[Scene: The kitchen. Jack and Emma are seeing people as they leave the party. The party has wrapped up and the place is a mess.]

Guys: Bye.

Jack: See ya, guys.

[the last of the guests leave, and Emma and Jack begin cleaning up]

Emma: So, where do you think C.J. And Jen came from?

Jack: I don't even want to think about it. Look, I'm sorry about your, um... failed marriage and everything.

Emma: Yeah, thanks, Jack, the sympathy is just oozing from your voice.

Jack: All right, well, between a loveless marriage and--and going home, don't you think going home would be a little bit better? I mean, you know, at least you'd have some time to figure some things out.

Emma: My folks are great, don't get me wrong, but it is my mom's dying wish to see me fail at this, and I just can't give her that satisfaction. You know, I'd be there one day, she'd have me tutoring the slow kids on the triangle. It's musical suicide. I'm not looking for love right now. When I find it, it usually kicks my ass.


Emma: And if at some point some Christian bale type does descend upon me, so to speak... I'll just, um...

Jack: Yeah.

Emma: I'll dump the poor sap I married. Hmm.

Jack: Well, I'm gonna have to have a little bit of private time with that, uh, Christian bale type before I can let you marry him. [Laughs]

Emma: Uh-uh.

Jack: You actually, I--I... I would be the perfect husband. You know, I can help you check out guys, I can...make sure they're not gay.

Emma: [Laughs] Yes, it is rather a hassle when you find that out late in the game, isn't it

Jack: Plus, you know, I wouldn't be pawing you all the time like Gus.

Emma: Well, that sounds great. Let's get married, then.

Jack: Let's do it.

Emma: [Laughs] Yeah, um... how much have you had to drink?

Jack: I'm just tryin' to help you out. I mean, we already live together, right?

Emma: Look, why do you think I asked Gus? 'Cause he's a nasty little creature who I don't care about. It's easier that way. I could never ask that big of a favor from a friend. I just--I couldn't.

Jack: Well, you don't have to 'cause... I'm askin' you.

Emma: Jack, you are too good.

Jack: Well, not really. I--I--I didn't get you a ring or—

Emma: That's a good point! No, you are. You are too good for that. I couldn't.

Jack: [Sighs] I would.

Emma: I know. I know you would, you madman. I wish I could take advantage of that. Nope. I can't ruin 2 lives. [Laughs] It's my mess. I've got to face it. I've been livin' too long in fantasy land. Go dry those dishes.

[Scene: Pacey's bedroom. Pacey is carrying a passes out Joey upstairs into the bedroom, and goes over and lies her down on the bed.]

Pacey: And here we are. Home, sweet...

Joey: Already?

Pacey: Already. I know, it's a long trip up from the living room.

Joey: That was fun. See, I'm a lovely drunk.

Pacey: You are indeed, Miss Potter.

[He takes off her boots]

Joey: I talked to so many new people tonight. People love me.

Pacey: And they love it when you tell them your friends' dirty little secrets.

Joey: Huh?

Pacey: Nothing. Never mind.

[Joey is falling asleep and her speech keeps getting quieter and quieter]

Joey: It was a wonderful party, Pacey. Until all the smashes and stuff.

Pacey: Yeah, the smashing was not so good.

Joey: I'm sorry about the television thing.

Pacey: It's ok. It happens. And I probably was getting a little too attached.

Joey: Can't have that.

Pacey: No. But I'm glad you had a good time. You deserved it. And you are a lovely and wise drunk, Miss Potter.

[Joey smiles and starts to push a hair off her face, before he arm just droops]

Pacey: What you said earlier was right. I never did. How could I? Just look at you.

[Joey leans up groggily]

Joey: You know what else we never did?

[She kisses him]

Joey: Your turn now.

[She then passes out back onto the bed.]

Pacey: Sweet dreams, Joey.

[He kisses her on the forehead, and then pulls the covers over her, before sitting down in a chair to watch her sleep.]

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