They fucking closed it again!

We're just going to have to reopen it again, right?

Wrong, blond boy.

I've done enough for the fags of this burg.

Let someone else lead the charge.

So you're just going to take it lying down?

That's generally how it's done.

I thought you wanted to get even.

I'd rather get laid.

It's bad enough he's holed up in the spare room,

Does he have to turn our home into a pigsty?

How tidy were you when you were his age?

Well, at least I didn't leave my smelly socks

On the dining room table.

Christ, he even found my secret stash of Mrs. Chips.

Give the kid a break, Michael.

For him, a bag of cookies and a warm bed are a luxury.

You know what would be a luxury to me?

Live-In maid? Loud, uninhibited,

Screaming, raunchy sex. Mmm.

You know, I did notice you were holding your breath last night.

Now, that's not healthy.

It's like keeping in a sneeze.

Yeah, well, I was afraid he'd hear us

And yell, "god bless you".

Well, I’m sure he's heard worse.

I'm sure he's done worse.

Time to get...

up.

Hey.

Hey!

We're leaving and so are you.

Can't I just sleep?

I was up half the night.

Doing what?

Listening to you guys trying to keep it down.

"Shhh! He'll hear us."

Next time just fuck your brains out.

Get it over with.

Thanks for the sex tips.

Any time.

Maybe we should just give him a key.

We are not giving him a key!

Well, now that he's living here... he's not living here.

He's staying here temporarily.

He still needs to get in.

He gets in when we let him in.

But where is he going to go all day?

School, perhaps?

Hm. Maybe you could take him to the store with you.

Why not take him to class with you?

Michael, my lecture today

Is on latent homosexuality in the works of Thomas man.

Somehow, I thought maybe he would appreciate

The second issue of "rage" more.

Not that it's not a post-Modern masterpiece.

All right, all right, I’m up.

What the fuck's the rush?

Oh, please, god. Teddy, let it be you.

Oh, of course it isn't. You have a key.

Oh, but maybe he lost it!

Oh... hi!

Hi. Hi.

Look at you.

Cleaning everything from top to bottom.

At the moment, there's, uh...

just a bottom.

You certainly are a busy beaver.

Oh, that's a true compliment, Melanie, coming from you.

So, um, w-What're you girls up to?

Well, we had a little outing this morning.

First we went to the farmer's market,

Then we took Gus to buy new shoes.

Then we went to the bank.

Not exactly a day in gay paree.

And guess what?

The missing funds from Gus' account

Have magically reappeared.

Every penny.

Well, that is a... nifty trick.

See? I told you not to worry.

So what's going on? One minute they're gone,

The next minute they're back. Well, uh...

beats me, but, uh...

but, hey, I always was a bubble-Brain

When it comes to math.

I mean, if Carlene dawes hadn't given me the answers

To that quiz in fifth grade,

I'd still be sitting there today.

And where's ted? Why hasn't he returned our calls?

He's... um...

he's out having his, uh...

Tires rotated. Come on, em,

What's wrong?

Teddy?

Oh... oh, hi, vic. Um...

no, no, no, I-I thought it might be ted.

Yeah, he's out at the grocery

And he's always forgetting something, so...

yeah, I-I better, uh, keep the line clear.

Ta!

You said he was having his tires rotated.

Oh, that was, um... that was...

that was before the grocery.

After he, uh...

he, uh...

he disappeared.

Vanished.

I haven't heard from him for days.

As long as you're here,

It wouldn't kill you to help out.

You know, straighten the racks, dust.

Is that why you took me in?

Slave labour?

Hey! I'm allergic to feathers! Yeah.

More like allergic to work.

Can't you see I’m reading?

What? X-Men? Spider-Man?

So, um, how do you like it?

It eats shit.

Excuse me?

Whoever heard of gay crusaders?

All fags care about is getting their dicks sucked.

Yeah...

well, for your information, I wrote that.

Then you ought to know.

Besides...

a hot, hunky superhero like rage would never exist.

Not in a million years.

Yo, shop keep.

Well, what're you doing here?

I thought you'd be out looking for a job.

I am.

Blow jobs.

What's the matter? Justin having dental work?

And since there's no place in town left to party,

I decided to throw one of my own,

And I thought that you might like to look over the guest list

Just in case you and the professor decide to stop by.

They go to bed a.

: ...

but I stay up late.

Huh! This the kid?

Hunter, this is Brian.

Wanna fuck?

Nice to meet you, too.

Now go do something useful.

I was trying to.

Precocious tyke.

Yeah, as if I didn't already have enough in my life. Now, now,

I think what you and ben are doing is incredibly generous.

Altruistic.

Huh. Noble. Yeah, in other words,

I should have my head examined.

The arctic-Like cold front from the north

Seems to be moving east,

Bringing with it warmer seasonal temperatures.

Expect showers throughout the central states,

With precipitation tapering off in the southern region.

There's still a thunderstorm alert

In the mountains, and flood warnings remain for the lower valleys.

International forecasts are next.

Followed by the national outlook.

Then will you need an umbrella or a sun hat?

What you can expect in your neighbourhood,

All coming up when we return.

Aren't you going to say hello?

I thought you were sleeping.

I didn't want to disturb you.

"Disturb me"?

I've only been up for the past three nights.

Where the fuck have you been?

Are you all right?

Yeah, I’m fine.

Just... I just, uh...

I needed to get away.

Well, you could've at least told me you were going.

Why didn't you... you call, or...

or leave a message?

You know, did it occur to you

That I might be scared out of my mind?

Of course, it did.

I just... I-I meant... I meant to call.

I... I just... I...

I wasn't in a very good place.

Funny, I’ve always heard palm springs

Was a very good place.

How did you know?

It doesn't matter how I know.

Well, I hope you had fun.

If you call a circuit party

With ,

tweaked out fags "fun".

So why did you go?

Because I’ve never been before.

Since I had the time... and the money.

Must've cost a pretty penny,

Leaving at the last minute.

Where'd it come from, hmm?

And before you say the cheque your granny gave you

For your birthday,

How about Gus' college fund?

The one Mel and Linz entrusted you with?

How could you steal money from a baby?

It's not like he's going to need it for another years.

Anyway, I-I didn't steal it, I borrowed it.

I have every intention of paying them back, with interest.

You don't have to repay them.

I already replaced it.

Every cent.

With the...

money I was going to use to buy that oven.

You did that for me?

Not just for you.

For them.

So they wouldn't have to look

At someone they love and trust,

And realize he's become a thief

And a liar.

So... you and Brian ever fuck?

What?

I said, did you and Brian ever fuck?

No, we never...

I didn't think so.

You're not his type.

Well, neither are you.

We'll see about that.

Hey, what's this all about?

Someone's got a schoolboy crush.

I do not! Oh, christ, that's all we need.

Just stay away from him, okay?

He's a bad influence.

I made you...

a triple-Scoop pistachio sundae,

Extra hot fudge

And sprinkles on top.

What the fuck do I look like?

Nine-Year-Old?

No, honey,

You don't.

You look like a smartass little twerp

Who could use some manners.

Now, how about a nice big thank you?

Thank you.

That's better.

Wait a minute, aren't you going to eat it?

I hate pistachio.

What's the matter? Nothing.

Do you know him? Jason Kemp?

Kinda.

Did he hustle too?

He was just starting out.

He hadn't learned the ropes, like who to go with,

Who not to, make sure you collect up front.

I've gotta get to work.

Hold it!

If you know anything about the night he died...

who he was with, uh, where he was,

You owe it to him to say something.

He's dead.

I don't owe him shit.

Anyway, he owed me bucks.

bucks?

There.

There!

Now it's your turn.

The night he got killed, we were at a bar.

He went off with this trick.

I warned him not to,

But Jason needed the money,

So he went anyway.

That's the last time I saw him.

Any idea who this guy was?

Why didn't you go to the police?

You've gotta be kidding.

They'd never arrest him.

Why not?

You figure it out.

A cop? That's right.

You're saying a cop killed Jason Kemp.

I'm saying that this kid saw him leave a hustler bar

At : o'clock in the morning

With someone that he knew was a cop,

And a couple of hours later,

The boy turns up dead in a dumpster.

Why should I take the word of some hustler?

Why shouldn't you?

Any number of reasons.

They're liars, thieves,

Drug dealers, addicts.

Just because your son and his friend

Have a soft spot in their hearts...

make that their heads...

and have taken one in

Doesn't mean he's to be believed or trusted.

Well, you could at least talk to him.

Get a fucking description!

Of someone he has it in for?

Who chased him off his corner?

Harassed one of his tricks?

Arrested him for prostitution?

It's a fucking lead, carl.

Can't you at least follow it?

It's off my desk.

Cold-Cased. By who?

Higher-Ups.

You mean stockwell?

That's none of your business.

Whoever killed Jason Kemp is my business.

So you can tell you’re... your higher-Ups

To get their asses down here

And put it back on the front burner.

I'm sorry, Mrs. Novotny...

but I don't take my orders from you.

He said he didn't do anything, but, uh...

he had that "rings of Saturn" look under his eyes.

Crystal?

Well, we all know the drug of choice

At the white party ain't advil.

I can't imagine ted...

I mean, you'd think he'd know better

Than to mess with that shit.

I could've killed him...

but he looked so tired, so pained,

I just wanted to hug him and...

tell him everything is going to be all right.

Hey, guys.

Teddy.

Hi, Michael.

Are you okay?

Listen, if you ever want to get together

And just talk things out... thanks, Michael,

But, uh, I’ve had my "lost weekend" and it's over.

I can now officially say I’ve been to my...

first white party, and my last.

I'll see you guys later.

Another cosmo, please.

I'll have a club soda.

I really must have crashed.

Woke up and you weren't there.

Yeah, well, I needed to get away.

I'm sure you can understand that.

I'm glad you got some rest.

Em... there's nothing to say.

It's perfectly logical.

One day, you're ted Schmidt, my best friend

And the love of my life, and the next day,

You're ted Schmidt, circuit boy.

And please don't tell me you didn't do any drugs,

Because it is obvious you did.

Okay, I tried it.

I'm a late bloomer.

I mean, I didn't even have sex with another guy

Until I was .

Well, I’m sure you made up for it this weekend.

Look, it's over and done.

I chalk it up to experience, I move on.

Tomorrow morning...

life begins anew.

You know, I... I was thinking. Uh...

maybe I’ll start another business.

You know, become a financial planner,

Build up a list of clients...

but first...

I’m going to go tell Melanie and Lindsay the truth.

That's, uh...

that's very admirable.

I just hope they accept my apology.

Then I’m going to make it up to you.

I know it's going to take more than just words, but...

Somehow, I... I’ll find a way.

Another quiet evening at the Kinney residence.

Hello, excuse me. Hi.

'Scuse me. Yeah.

'Scuse me, honey.

Pardon me, baby.

Hi.

Glad to see you're playing safely.

Did I come at a bad time?

No...

but I did.

Who the fuck's she?

Huh. The avon lady.

Can't you see I’m in the middle of someone?

I'm sorry... to pull you away

But there's something I thought you should know.

The kid Michael and ben took in

Said the night that Jason Kemp died,

He saw him in a hustler bar, picking up a cop.

And what're you telling me for?

You know, if you tried thinking with your brain

Instead of your dick, you might realize

That stockwell and his campaign

Could be in deep shit if it turned out that...

that the killer was one of Pittsburgh’s finest.

Do me a favour, Debbie,

Tell your boyfriend.

He's not my boyfriend...

and I already did and he wouldn't do anything.

Well, what do you expect me to do?

Nail the bastard!

The only person I’m interested in nailing...

is him.

Now, if you'll excuse me...

just do it, do it!

All right, baby, they'll hear you in Scranton.

So what if they do?

Oh my god. Oh!

What's the matter? Uh...

Fuck, I just have a lot on my mind, that's all. It's...

uh-H, this course I’m teaching, and, uh...

This chapter I’m... I’m stuck on.

This kid.

Yeah. Yeah, he's, uh...

he's out there on the street,

Turning tricks, all right?

Hopefully being careful,

But what if he picks up the wrong guy?

He could end up the next kid in a dumpster, Michael.

Christ!

He fucks up our sex life when he's here,

And now he's fucking it up when he's not here.

Okay, that... that's him.

At least everyone in scranton'll have a good night's sleep.

Where have you two been?

Movie...

and a mattress sale.

% off.

Well, I hope it gets here soon.

Listening to that old thing squeak

Every time you two get it on keeps me awake.

Maybe if you didn't have your ear pressed to the wall.

Think I’ll go warm up the sheets.

So why're your tits in a twist?

They run out of that empress Alexandra bracelet you've been waiting for?

You wouldn't understand.

No, of course not.

We've known each other such a brief time.

Never mind.

Rodney's waiting.

What's going on?

What is it, sis?

He looked right through me.

Who did? Horvath, who do you think?

And he called me Mrs. Novotny,

Like I was... a total stranger.

A total fucking stranger.

I hate men.

Why couldn't I have been a lesbian?

Because mom would've had a heart attack

If both her kids were gay.

Stuffing this in your mouth

Isn't going to make you feel any better.

Horvath's like a cheese doodle.

You told me he was well-Endowed.

I mean, you just shouldn't start...

'cause once you do...

all you want is more.

Just better never to have had any at all

Than to... we have indeed sold out.

Sorry, that's it.

Shit!

They just sold out!

Fuck!

It's okay.

You better wear some gloves and a ski cap.

It's freezing outside.

Oh. Christ, did I just say that?

I sound like my mother.

Actually, make that your mother.

Thanks.

Anything else?

Be sure to wear your rubbers.

Wait up.

Now what?

Thought you might need this.

I thought you didn't trust me.

Well...

this way we don't have to stop whatever it is we're doing

To let you in.

Surprised you did that.

Mmm. Once he's gone, we can always change the lock.

Must've been quite an elegant affair.

"Long night's journey into day".

You should've been there.

Yeah, I was helping Daphne study for midterms.

of Pittsburgh’s hottest, horniest hunks...

and Debbie.

Well, I know how much she wants to be a gay man

But is it wise to encourage her?

Well, she couldn't wait to tell me the news.

It seems the littlest hustler knew dumpster boy,

Saw him picking up a cop the night he was murdered.

Oh, shit. Yeah.

For some reason...

she thought I would be interested.

Aren't you?

No. I already told you... right.

You want to have fun, fun, fun

Till your daddy takes your freedom away.

In case you haven't noticed, he already has.

But...

if you're content turning your place

Into the next backroom...

fine.

Only how are you going to keep a cleaning lady?

I made a hasty decision.

A poor one.

And one for which I will always be ashamed, but...

I hope you can find it in your hearts to forgive me,

And... if not today then... someday...

and that somehow...

I can earn back your love and...

uh, your respect.

That's...

very brave of you, ted,

To come here and...

own up to what you did.

Don't you think, Mel?

Yeah. Yeah, it took guts and...

it was a very nice speech.

But we'll have to wait and see.

See what?

Saying you're sorry is one thing,

Meaning it is another.

He told you it was a mistake.

It's all right, em. I-I don't need you to defend me.

I don't blame you for not accepting my apology, Mel.

If I were you...

I doubt I would, either, so...

she didn't say she didn't accept it.

All I’m saying is, we'll see.

That's all.

I understand.

Uh, would you excuse me?

I just want to go use your bathroom.

Do you have any idea how hard that was for him?

I know. I feel so bad for him. Well, I don't.

He's a fucking drug user.

That is not true.

He tried it once.

Come off it, Emmett.

For him to get to the point

Where he'd actually steal our money...

He didn't steal it. He borrowed it.

He was planning on putting it back.

And you believe him?

Don't you? I thought you were his friends.

We are his friends! Damn good friends.

Then why can't you show him the teeniest,

Tiniest bit of compassion?

Because he'd only abuse it and us.

Mel! The same way he's abusing you.

He is not abusing me.

And what do you call it?

He is counting on me,

To be there for him,

To... to believe in him.

To help him put his life back in order.

Could you stop being a silly faggot

And have some balls, for christ's sakes?

Well, I may be a silly faggot...

but you know something, Mel?

You're a cunt.

Hey, hey, hey...

Mmm... hey, hey, hey, hey!

Oh, I’m so hot. I could just go down on you right here.

Hey, don't... won't... I don't think Mrs. Giannini

Would appreciate taking tiberius for his stroll

And seeing you giving me a blow job.

Mmm... okay.

Then hurry up and open the fucking door. Be patient.

We got the place to ourselves all afternoon,

Okay? So you can scream as loud as you...

shit!

What the fuck?

I thought you were working.

We didn't know you'd be.

Get out of here, you sick fuck.

I want my money back.

Here. You can put it towards your bail when I call the police

And have you arrested for soliciting a minor!

One more happy, satisfied customer, thanks to you!

We did not give you a key so that you could turn tricks in our home.

You never said I couldn't.

Because we never thought you would.

W... I need the money, okay?

For what? For when you get tired

Of doing your good deed and you kick me out.

Who said anything about kicking you out?

You pull another stunt like this and we will.

Look, if... if this is some test

To see how far you can go to provoke us

So that we'll tell you to leave, it's not going to work.

We want you here.

So you can feel good about yourself.

Well, fuck that shit!

You can keep your damn key.

Hey, man, what's up? You want some of this?

Hey, come on, slow down.

Hey, I got a nice tight ass here for ya.

Hey!

You like young dick?

It's yours. bucks.

Wouldn't've done you anyway, motherfucker!

Hey, how about a threesome, baby?

Oh ho-Ho. Check it out.

There's my daddy. Whoo-Hoo-Hoo.

Over here, bud. Figured you'd come around eventually.

Get in.

Thought you'd never ask.

Sweet ride. Thanks.

So, you ready for a big night?

Yeah, how about you?

I'm up for anything. Uh-Huh, well then...

you better buckle up...

for safety.

All right, we've got the fruit,

And the vino.

Now all we need is the cheese.

And a new oven.

I thought you said you'd saved up enough.

I, uh... I miscalculated.

I'm a bubblehead when it comes to math.

I mean, if Carlene dawes hadn't given me the answers

To that quiz in fifth grade...

ah, fuck it.

Well, we'll never be able to do everything we have to

With the equipment you've got.

I've never had any complaints about my equipment before.

Yeah? Oh, hi.

How's he doing?

Uh, he's been through a lot, poor baby.

But he's back now.

That's all I care about.

Well, I’d keep an eye on him.

Just in case.

You know, I-I'm getting a little sick

Of everyone telling me what I should do,

And what they would do.

So he went to a fucking circuit party,

Like every other faggot in the world.

It's not like all of a sudden he's a...

crystal queen.

I'm just saying it may be awhile

Until he's himself again.

Uh, vic,

Can you handle the party tomorrow night?

You're not going to be there?

Just this once.

Um, I-I-I'd like to take the night off,

If that's all right with you.

I thought you said he comes in here every night.

He does. Then where the fuck is he?

How do I know?

Maybe he got lucky.

You could get lucky, too.

I've got a... tight ass

And no gag reflex. What do you say?

I say we give it five more minutes,

And then you can go ply your charms

On that drooler at the end of the bar.

How about I pay you?

You couldn't afford me.

That's the guy.

Not exactly a beauty.

You were expecting a playgirl centrefold?

Want me to go with you?

No, just stay here and behave yourself.

Don't talk to any strangers.

Slim pickings here tonight.

But then, I like them slim.

How about you?

You come here often?

It's my first time.

You know, I miss the good old days of politics,

When we had real crooks and real liars:

Nixon, bush the first.

Now all we have are these second-Rate amateurs

That can't even pull that off.

Look at this clown.

Clueless.

He's a moron.

Can barely put two words together...

so they show him playing basketball.

That's supposed to qualify the jerk to run the city?

He'll make a hell of a mayor.

You say something?

I said he'll make a hell of a mayor. Mmm.

He hasn't made much of a police chief.

What the hell do you know?

C'mon. Everybody knows this guy can be bought

Faster than a piece of chicken-To-Go.

Soon as his fat cat supporters put him in office,

You can bet there won't be any more crime on the street

'Cause it'll all be in city hall.

That's a goddamn lie.

I worked with Jim for years.

I never saw him take a cent from anyone.

There's no more honest guy.

Whatever you say.

Say, you're not a cop, are you?

'Cause I’m just having a drink.

You ask too many questions.

What happened?

What did he say?

Do you think he killed him?

You ask too many questions.

So maybe he knew him.

So maybe he's a cop.

So what?

So maybe it proves that the kid's telling the truth.

But what it doesn't prove is he picked up Jason Kemp,

Had sex with him, then murdered him.

Well, maybe if you talked to the guy.

Oh, what's his name?

Oh, I don't know. I didn't get his card.

What's he look like?

Somewhat bald, somewhat overweight, somewhat middle-Aged.

You just described half the guys on the force.

Yeah, including you.

Look, I know what this is about

And it's not justice.

You want to point a finger at an officer of the law

To embarrass the chief.

Don't expect any help from me.

Well, how about doing it for Debbie?

Leave her out of this.

So what is it going to take?

To reheat this case?

A lot more than you brought me.

Such as? Hard evidence.

Something to link the suspect with the victim,

To prove they were together.

Dna? Saliva, hair.

What? A condom full of jizz?

Sure, if you want to collect it.

Jesus.

Hey, daddy, slow down.

Let's have some fun.

Catch you later.

Hey!

Hey!

Didn't you see me coming?

Why do you think I was trying to get away?

So what do you want?

You dropped this.

I don't want it.

I already told you, I’m not coming back.

Well, where do you plan to go?

Maui, south of France.

I haven't decided yet.

Well, until you do...

you're staying with us.

Which means you're going to make your bed,

You're going to pick up your shit

And if you ever bring home a trick again,

I will kick your fucking ass!

That's child abuse!

Report me. You're not my parents.

And you're not my son.

But we're the ones who are giving you three squares

And a roof over your head...

so make sure you're back by midnight,

And bolt the door.

You didn't have to miss your party tonight.

Vic can handle it.

You can still go if you want to.

I'd rather be here with you.

I can't tell you how much it meant

The way you stood up for me in front of Mel and Linz.

Couldn't believe the things they were saying.

Some friends.

From now on, this is a dykefree zone.

Those two are... "puss-Ona non grata".

Now...

since I have you...

all to myself...

why don't we make the most of it?

Teddy?

I'm sorry.

It's all right.

I've just got so much on my mind.

All right, well...

Here, relax. Roll over.

I'll give you a massage.

What's that?

Huh...

magic.

Ta-Da!

I thought you said you were done with that.

I am. It's just a little souvenir from...

sunny palm springs.

You ever try it?

In my wayward youth.

Didn't do much for me.

You must not have had the right stuff,

'Cause I’m telling you, this stuff...

you can't believe it.

I felt...

so good...

for once...

you know, all those voices that tell me that I’m shit,

I'm nothing, I’m ugly,

They were finally gone.

I felt so hot,

So sexy.

The way Brian must feel all the time.

Everybody wanted me,

And I wanted them.

I could fuck a roomful of guys

And... still want to fuck some more.

Well, you don't need them now...

'Cause you've got me. And when you come...

ah, it's like you come for hours.

For days... it's so...

oh-H.

Come on... em...

try it with me.

No...

then you'll see what it's like.

Yeah... no...

Then it will all make sense. I don't...

why we were born...

why we were put here...

to fuck and fuck...

and fuck.

Mmm.

Look at all these old guys.

Yeah, it's sad, isn't it? Yeah.

Some of them are even older than you are.

Ah, I guess at their age, if they want it,

They got to pay for it.

Another reason to die young.

Or to accept the fact that youth and beauty are fleeting,

That time will inevitably leave its mark

And that we should accept our mortality

With grace and dignity.

Until then, I could really clean up in this place.

Well, just sit there and wait.

So what exactly do you want me to say to this guy?

Oh, be your natural self.

Charm him with your witty repartee.

"How'd you like to plough my smooth, tight ass?"

And then, when he's busy slobbering down your neck,

You discretely pocket his cigarette butt.

You're going to owe me, like, blowjobs for this.

Look who's here.

Come to find me?

Uh, yeah, you're all I’ve been thinking about.

Fuck off.

Excuse me?

I said get lost.

I saw him first.

Really?

Justin, this is hunter.

It's Michael and ben's new foundling.

They discovered him on their doorstep.

Now, why don't you go play someplace else?

We got work to do.

If you want to hustle that cop,

You should've asked me.

At least I’m a professional.

We just need a little dna.

Nothing to it.

I can do it! I'm sure you can

But you've already done enough,

So why don't you scamper home?

I'm sure your aunties are beside themselves.

Fucking teenagers.

I don't know how anyone puts up with them.

You coming to bed?

In a while.

It's after midnight. I know.

I just thought I’d give him a few more minutes.

You know, you set a rule,

You got to live by it...

so does he.

What if he doesn't come back?

Come to bed.

No need checking it out.

Nobody there.

I'll take a look for myself.

You won't do better there than what's right here.

You've never been interested in me before.

Why tonight?

Must be the moonlight.

for a blowjob.

How much without a condom?

I don't do that...

but you won't be disappointed.

I'll make sure of it.