Phoebe: Chandler still thinks I'm pregnant and he hasn't asked me how I'm feeling or offered to carry my bags. I feel bad for the woman who ends up with him.
Ross: I would date her but there is a big age difference. Joey: Well think about it when you're 90... Ross: I know, she'll be 80 and it won't be such a big difference. Joey: No. What I was gonna say is when you're 90 you'll still have the memory of what it was like to be with a 20-year-old.
Phoebe: [Right after playing a song in the coffee shop ] If you want to receive e-mails about my upcoming shows, then please give me money so I can buy a computer.
Ross: [receiving his Christmas gift] You got me a cola drink. Chandler: And a LEMON LIME. Ross: You shouldn't have. I feel like I should get you another sweater. Joey: And last but not least. [Monica receives her gift] Joey: They're RIBBED FOR YOUR PLEASURE.
Chandler: All right, look if you absolutely have to tell her the truth, at least wait until the timing's right. And that's what deathbeds are for.