SCENE - Rexford, Idaho

Outside view of a cabin in the dark.

Inside the cabin: A woman's voice is heard, over a phone; a sweaty, disheveled man (JOE) pacing around inside the cabin, listening to her on speakerphone (or just really loud phone).

HOTLINE COUNSELOR

Sir?

Sir, can you hear me?

Please – please just say something.

Are you still there?

Keep talking, and I can help you through this.

Please, sir, if you can hear me, stay on the phone.

It may feel hopeless right now, but, but you called the hotline for a reason.

There's some part of you that still wants to live – some part that knows suici–

JOE hangs up the phone. He opens a drawer in a dresser, sighs heavily, and pulls out a gun. He points the gun to his forehead, and gasps heavily, then looks at a picture of a woman and a child and sobs again. He lowers the gun slowly, and drops it back in the drawer. Suddenly he hears a sound behind him, and whirls around.

A man steps forward into the scene.

JOE

Who are you? Did the lady from the hotline send you?

INTRUDER

No. (He's wearing a small cross earring in his left ear.) You did.

The intruder puts his hand toward Joe's head. View from outside the cabin; A reddish/white light shines and someone (JOE) screams. A liquid splashes onto the window.

ACT ONE

SCENE - Gas'n'Sip

Hands pouring coffee. Hands closing change drawer.

TITLE: "HEAVEN CAN'T WAIT"

Hands wiping front of freeze machine. Two men's voices are heard chatting.

StarringJARED PADELECKI

The camera widens angle, to show CASTIEL walking from behind a counter, wearing a bright blue staff vest, and carrying a cup of coffee – he's working in a convenience store.

JENSEN ACKLES

CASTIEL closely watches the two men, chatting at the coffee-stand. One man is stirring his coffee. CASTIEL watches and stirs his coffee. The man licks his stir stick. CASTIEL licks his own stir stick. The two men continue to have conversation:

Men laughing.

MAN 1

I know, and that play in the second quarter?

MAN 2

I mean, what team is he playing for?

MAN 1

Not ours.

The man aims and tosses his stir stick into the garbage. The other guy and CASTIEL both watch.

MAN 2

High-five! (The men high-five.)

CASTIEL turns around to a garbage can near him. He aims, leans forward slightly, and tosses his own stir stick into the garbage. He gives a small smile of triumph when he makes it.

A delivery man walks in.

DELIVERY MAN

Morning, Steve (he says briskly to Castiel)

CASTIEL

Bill. High— (CASTIEL holds up his hand for a high-five as the delivery man walks past, ignoring it. ) —five. (CASTIEL closes his hand and lowers it.)

The delivery guy drops a load of newspapers on the counter and turns around, leaving and nodding at Castiel on his way out. CASTIEL walks over to the stack of newspapers and begins unbinding them.

MISHA COLLINS

WOMAN (NORA, from off-screen)

Sorry I'm late.

CASTIEL looks up.

WOMAN (NORA)

I had to … drop the baby off at daycare—

Guest StarringMARK A. SHEPPARD

NORA

—then hit every red light on the way here. (She looks around.) But guess I shouldn't have worried.

OSRIC CHAU

NORA

Place looks great. Coffee urns?

CASTIEL

Uh, full.

NORA

Dairy case?

ALAINA HUFFMAN

CASTIEL

Stocked.

NORA

Okay, Steve, last question – (CASTIEL looks up attentively) – where have you been all my life? (CASTIEL's mouth works, speechlessly.)

ASHTON HOLMES

NORA

You're not like the other sales associates.

TANYA CLARKE

NORA

There's... something different about you.

CASTIEL

I can assure you, there's – there's not.

NORA

I know these things. You're ... hmm … special.

Co-ProducerCRAIG MATHESON

Co-ProducersJERRY WANEKSERGE LADOUCEUR

ProducerROBBIE THOMPSON

NORA walks past CASTIEL into a back room. CASTIEL turns to watch her, wistfully, or maybe thoughtfully.

ProducerTODD ARONAUER

CASTIEL turns back to the pile of newspapers, and picks up the top copy of the Rexford Post newspaper, reading the paper's headline: "LOCAL MAN PRESUMED DEAD", sub headed, "Fourth unexplained disappearance in weeks". The accompanying photo is of JOE, the suicidal man-cum-supernatural murder victim from the teaser.

SCENE - Bunker, with Sam, Dean, Kevin

Pictures of a sheaf of drawings in red and black, with words and cryptic symbols and numbers; someone is picking them up and looking through them.

SAM's voice

That's your "big … news", is that you, that you translated the tablet into ... doodles? (disdainfully)

KEVIN

It's cuneiform. (SAM and DEAN both look at him.) I-I hit a wall translating the tablet into English. But I found an ancient codex, uh, linking the Angel script to proto-Elamite cuneiform, and I was able to translate the tablet and the footnotes into Elamite, which … is …

DEAN

Doodles.

KEVIN

It's extinct.

SAM

Well, can you read it?

KEVIN

No one can. Scholars have tried for centuries.

DEAN

So it's a dead end? (DEAN slaps the papers down on the table in disgust. SAM puts his sheaf of papers on the table too.)

KEVIN

N-not quite. Now, most proto-Elamite is abstract, but I was able to decipher one phrase from Metatron's footnotes. "Falling angels."

SAM

Okay, so, the footnotes refer to Metatron's spell?

KEVIN

Maybe.

SAM

Okay. (Walking to bookshelf.) Well, maybe if we can decipher the footnotes, then we can reverse the spell and...

SAM pulls off three of a set of a dozen books.

DEAN

Punt those winged dicks back to heaven. (DEAN slaps the table, ready for action.) Where do we start?

SAM

Research. (SAM tosses one book in front of each of the other two. DEAN's expression is less than thrilled.) We comb through the library, see if we can find anything else on Elamite.

DEAN (reading the title of the book)

Zimmerman's Encyclopedia of Extinct Languages … Volume One: Adai to Atakapa. How many volumes are there?

KEVIN

24.

DEAN's mouth works soundlessly.

KEVIN, reassuringly

Don't worry, we've found them all. (KEVIN looks back down at his own book.)

DEAN

Awesome. (He looks pleadingly over at SAM, who chuffs and looks down at his book.)

DEAN's phone rings.

DEAN mutters

There is a God.

SAM watches DEAN as he answers the phone.

DEAN

Hello?

CASTIEL (calling from the Gas'n'Sip)

I may have a case for you. (CASTIEL is cleaning the slurpee machine while he talks.) Four missing in Rexford, Idaho. (DEAN stands up, walking away from the table.)

Consulting ProducersBRAD BUCKNEREUGENIE ROSS-LEMING

CASTIEL

Presumed dead, but no bodies have been released to loved ones. And, there were reports of a strange substance at the scenes.

Co-Executive ProducersERIC CHARMELONICOLE SNYDER

DEAN

Oh, well, hello to you too, Cas. How are you?

Co-Executive ProducerANDREW DABB

CASTIEL

I ... am busy.

DEAN shakes his head.

DEAN

All right. So, how do you want to do this?

Executive ConsultantERIC KRIPKE

DEAN

You want to meet up at the latest scene? You want me to pick you up? What?

CASTIEL's efforts with the Slushy machine are not going well. A flood of liquid blue slushy mix spills out over the machine and onto the floor. DEAN hears the trickling sound and looks puzzled.

CASTIEL

Um … I've got my hands full over here. I just – um...

DEAN

Cas? Hello?

CASTIEL (trying to hold onto multiple things at the same time)

— thought you would want to know about the case. (CASTIEL takes the phone and puts it in his pocket.)

Executive ProducerADAM GLASS

DEAN

Hey, you sure everything's — (He hears the click and looks at the phone.) O-kay …

Executive ProducerPHIL SGRICCIA

SCENE - Bunker, with Sam, Dean, and Kevin

KEVIN is looking at a book on a counter in the computer room. DEAN is walking into the room from downstairs, with SAM's voice (and SAM) following him. DEAN has an overnight bag slung over his shoulder.

SAM

So, he said nothing about where he is or – or what he's been doing?

They enter the computer room.

Co-Executive ProducerJIM MICHAELS

DEAN

This is Cas.

Created byERIC KRIPKE

DEAN

In case you forgot, he's not exactly Chatty Cathy.

SAM (incredulously)

And you're not even gonna see him when you're in Idaho?

Written byROBERT BERENS

DEAN

Well, like I said, as long as he's catnip for angels, he's keeping his distance.

DEAN turns to continue walking, now leaving the room.

Directed byROB SPERA

SAM

So then, what's the point, Dean?

SAM walks over to KEVIN; they're both looking up at DEAN offscreen, as he has walked upstairs.

SAM (continues)

I mean, it's barely even a case.

DEAN (from a balcony, talking down to the other two)

That's why I'm just gonna go have a little look-see, and … we're not gonna waste a whole lot of manpower on a big pile of nada.

KEVIN

In other words, a perfect excuse to bail out on research.

DEAN

(brief pause) You got me.

DEAN turns and walks out. SAM and KEVIN look exasperated.

SCENE - Gas'n'Sip, with Castiel & Nora

CASTIEL is on a ladder, changing a fluorescent tube bulb.

NORA enters.

NORA

Hey, Steve? I found this in the supply closet. (She holds up a plastic bag with … toothpaste ? in it) Do you know whose it is?

CASTIEL

Um... (comes down from the ladder) That's mine. Thanks.

NORA

I also found a rolled-up sleeping bag behind the tool locker.

CASTIEL

Yes, (thinking fast) I wanted to be thorough with inventory, so I worked late last week, and taking a nap here was easier than going back home to my bed. Which I-I have, of course – a bed...and a home.

NORA

Wow, Steve. You're so... responsible.

She walks away, and he turns to go back to the ladder. Then she pauses and turns back toward him.

NORA

I've been afraid to ask. I-I don't want to take advantage of you as my employee, and I certainly don't want to jeopardize our working relationship. But as a working single mom, it's hard enough to get a date, let alone meet a really great guy. (CASTIEL looks a little puzzled about where all this is going.) And … tomorrow's my night off, and I know you're off, too, and … I was just wondering if there's any chance you're... free tomorrow night?

CASTIEL

Um... (pause) Yes? (looks down; happy guitar music starts) Yes.

NORA gives him a kiss on the cheek.

NORA

You're the best! (She bounces off happily.)

CASTIEL looks around, confused, and turns back to the ladder, with a look of pleased anticipation on his face.

SCENE - Crime scene at Joe's cabin

DEAN's reflection in the car. He's suited up, talking to local law enforcement (SHERIFF), outside VICTIM JOE's cabin.

DEAN

So, uh, four missing?

SHERIFF

Four dead. Just got confirmation.

DEAN ducks under yellow tape, followed by the SHERIFF.

DEAN

And, uh, any common threads you can think of?

SHERIFF

Well, Joe in there had the suicide hotline on speed dial. The gal before him was a shut-in. Had enough antidepressants in her medicine cabinet to stock a pharmacy. The first victims – a married couple out of Sugar City. Pretty much a walking billboard for no-fault divorce.

DEAN

Were they all basket cases?

SHERIFF

If you asked me to make a list of this county's saddest sacks, these four would've been right on top.

DEAN

All right, so, four unhappy people, one of them definitely suicidal. But you've ruled out suicide?

The SHERIFF hands blue gloves to DEAN.

SHERIFF

You're gonna want to put these on.

Inside the cabin, which is awash with pink spray paint; someone in a hazmat white plastic body condom is kneeling, scraping evidence. The door opens and DEAN and the SHERIFF walk in. DEAN (who is wearing white gloves) grimaces at the odor. He turns around and looks at the room, which is covered with pink.

SHERIFF

This look like suicide to you?

DEAN

Blood?

SHERIFF

If the tests come back same as the others … it's everything. Blood, skin, hair, nails. Internal organs. Even clothing fibers. Like these poor souls got run through the world's finest wood-chipper.

DEAN

What about witnesses?

SHERIFF

Same as the rest. Neighbors reported some kind of a pink flash. By the time we got here, all that was left was ... this.

SCENE - Sam (bunker) and Dean (Impala) on the phone

SAM is on the phone, drinking a cup of something; he and KEVIN are sitting at a table with library lamps doing research. He stands up while on the phone:

SAM

Yeah, we're almost through the texts over here. (pause) We got nothing.

DEAN is leaning against the IMPALA, with a coffee cup.

DEAN

Have you tried Professor Morrison?

SAM

Yeah, he's unreachable. He took a sabbatical to live amongst the Trobrianders of Papua New Guinea. Needless to say, we're pretty burnt.

DEAN

Well, there's one guy there who is nothing if not well-rested.

SAM

Crowley?

DEAN

I'm just saying we're not keeping him chained up for the one-liners.

SAM

It's worth a shot, I guess.

DEAN

Just be careful, all right? Don't fall for any of his "quid pro quo" crap.

SAM

Noted. So, what about you? How's Cas's lead panning out?

DEAN

Four victims suddenly exploded. I tried EMF. I've looked for hex bags, sulfur – nada.

SAM

Spontaneous combustion? Maybe the Thule?

DEAN

No, no, no. I already ruled them out. The bodies were vaporized. They weren't burned.

SAM

That sounds like a real case. Dean, I should be there.

DEAN

Naw, man. That's – That's uh ... not necessary. No, I, uh – I got this one covered.

Pause, then DEAN clicks the phone closed. He stares at the Gas'n'Sip convenience store, and CASTIEL, visible through the window, bagging a purchase for a customer. DEAN thoughtfully taps his cell on the car.

SCENE - High school, bus

Teenage girl walking across the street from a school, to a school bus, talking on her cell.

GIRL

He dumped me, Jace. (pause) In the cafeteria. In front of everyone. It's just like ... who does that, you know? Like, why couldn't he just dump me on Facebook like a normal person? (pause) I've been destroyed. Socially and romantically … totaled. (pause) I know. I'm just so embarrassed, Jace. I could just die.

A hand on her shoulder. She turns around to see the same guy with the cross earring who killed the first victim.

MURDEROUS INTRUDER

I can help with that.

He lifts a hand, and a pink light and buzzing sound start.

GIRL

What?

His hand approaches her forehead. She screams. A spray of pink hits the side of the bus where she was standing.

ACT TWO

SCENE - Gas'n'Sip

One guy walks out, holds the door for another guy walks in with a case of beer who says "Thanks." A hand hits a button for the Idaho Lotto ticket. (Number 24 27 74 22 44 47 ?) CASTIEL hands the ticket to a woman.

CASTIEL

Good day, ma'am.

(CASTIEL gives her an emphatic thumbs-up, and says very intensely:)

And good luck!

She looks a little puzzled and gives him a thumbs-up as she leaves.

The next customer in line is DEAN.

DEAN

I'll have some beef jerky and a pack of menthols.

CASTIEL

What are you doing here?

DEAN

Gee, it's nice to see you, too, Cas.

CASTIEL

It's … Steve now. (gesturing towards his employee name tag) And... uh, you know you surprised me.

DEAN

Well, the feeling is mutual. I mean, I knew you had to lay low from the angel threat, but, uh, wow. This is some cover.

CASTIEL

My Grace is gone. What did you expect? Do you have any idea how hard it was? When I fell to earth, I didn't just lose my powers. I – I had nothing. Now... I'm a sales associate (proudly)

DEAN

A sales associate?

The beer delivery guy hands "Steve" a clipboard.

DELIVERY GUY

Hey, Steve. Sign here?

CASTIEL takes the clipboard and signs it, continuing to speak to DEAN.

CASTIEL

I'm responsible for inventory, sales, customer service. I keep this place — (he hands the clip board to the delivery guy, who says "Thank you" and leaves) – Thank YOU (to the delivery guy) — clean and presentable. And when my manager's busy, I even prepare the food.

DEAN

Wow. So you went from fighting … heavenly battles to nuking taquitos?

CASTIEL (nodding)

Nachos too.

SCENE - Bunker Basement, Crowley

Basement, CROWLEY is chained to a chair, with a table in front of him; SAM is sitting on the edge of the table.

CROWLEY (holding a paper with the "doodles" of the cuneiform)

I've been politely asking for reading material for weeks, and this is what you bring me?

(CROWLEY puts the paper on the table and pushes it back toward SAM.)

Pass.

SAM

Can you read Elamite or not?

CROWLEY

It's by no means my favorite of the ancient tongues, but yes.

SAM

Will you help us read it?

CROWLEY

Why on earth would I?

SAM

Because I was there that night. I saw what humanity did to you. (Crowley scoffs very quietly.) Like it or not, there's still a little part of you that's not a douche.

CROWLEY

Sorry, Moose. To the last drop.

SAM gets off the table, and leans over it towards CROWLEY

Crowley, the only reason you're alive is because my brother thought you would be useful. So far you've done Jack.

(SAM sighs, and shakes his head.)

Back to plan "B," I guess.

SAM stands up fully, takes the paper, starts walking away.

CROWLEY

Which is?

SAM (walking)

Give you up to Abaddon.

CROWLEY (to SAM's back)

You think you can threaten me with that hack?!

(SAM pauses, turns around to face CROWLEY)

She's all fury, no finesse.

SAM

I'm not so sure. Our last encounter with Abaddon, she was, uh — she was pretty terrifying. Scarier than you've been in years. (SAM laughs.)

CROWLEY

Bring that to me.

SAM walks back toward CROWLEY with the paper, and hands it to him. CROWLEY wads it up and throws it in his face, temper tantrum-style. SAM looks pissed. He walks out of the room, shutting the door behind him.

SCENE - Gas'n'Sip

CASTIEL-as-STEVE is carrying a box of small jars. DEAN is walking behind him, talking.

DEAN

This is not you, man. You are above this. Come on. (CASTIEL has a stubborn expression on his face.)

CASTIEL

No, Dean. (He puts the box on the counter and turns to face DEAN.) I'm not. I failed at being an angel. Everything I ever attempted came out wrong. But here … at least I have a shot at getting things right. I guess you can't see it, but … there's a real dignity in what I do – human dignity.

NORA

Hate to interrupt you guys, but, Steve? Customer had an accident in the men's room.

CASTIEL

I'm on it.

NORA

Oh, and tonight – 7:00 at my place work for you?

CASTIEL

Great.

NORA

You're the best!

DEAN

That's what this is about!

CASTIEL

What?

DEAN

The girl.

CASTIEL

No, Dean. It's not. Nora – she's a very nice woman, I'm pretty sure she's not a reaper intent on killing me … and she's asked me out. Going on dates – that's something humans do, right?

DEAN

Yeah. I mean, my dates usually end when I run out of singles, but, uh, yeah. Yeah, that's something that … humans do.

DEAN's cell rings.

DEAN (on the phone)

This is Agent Lee Ermey. (pause) I'll be right there.

(DEAN hangs up the phone and speaks to CASTIEL.)

There was another kill, over at the high school. You comin'?

CASTIEL

I wouldn't be much use. I don't have my powers.

DEAN

So? I've never had powers.

CASTIEL

You are a hunter.

DEAN

And you're a hunter in training, remember?

CASTIEL

Yeah, I remember. You said I sucked.

DEAN

I didn't say that. I said that there was, uh, uh, you know, "room for improvement." Come on.

CASTIEL

All right, my shift's over in five minutes, and my date's not until later, so...

DEAN

Attaboy! I'll go get the car.

CASTIEL

Not just yet. I have to clean the bathroom? (He pointedly reminds DEAN.)

SCENE at the BUS

DEAN, in civvies, walks up and shows a badge to a cop to get into the yellow tape zone. CASTIEL in his blue vest accompanies him. DEAN sees a cop talking to a young girl and heads that way. CASTIEL is looking at the scene in horror and recognition. A haz-mat suited cop is picking up evidence, and a balding crime scene photographer has got his camera out. The camera pans over the bus which is liberally painted with pink spray.

Tearful girl (JACE, the friend that the victim was speaking to earlier) talking to SHERIFF; DEAN joins the twosome.

JACE

One second, we're talking, and the next, she just...stops. And then everyone in the cafeteria freaks, rushing, and pointing out the window, at — (she breaks into sobs) C- could that really be her?

DEAN

And nobody saw anybody else at the scene – a man, a woman ... anything unusual?

Jace shakes her head.

DEAN

Your friend, was she, uh, depressed?

JACE

Depressed?

DEAN

Any thoughts of suicide?

JACE

Ew. No. I mean, she was kind of bummed that dick-bag Travis broke up with her in front of the whole school.

DEAN

'Kind of bummed'?

JACE

Yeah. (Sarcastically.) Like more bummed than when she got a "C" on a quiz, and... less bummed than when her parents split up. 'Kind of ... bummed.'

JACE looks at DEAN like he's a moron. DEAN looks nonplussed. The SHERIFF looks amused.

JACE sobs some more. DEAN turns towards the bus.

DEAN

Excuse me.

DEAN walks towards the IMPALA, where CASTIEL is leaning.

DEAN

Cas, what's wrong?

CASTIEL

I've seen this before.

DEAN

What? Where?

CASTIEL

In heaven.

DEAN

What, you're saying an angel did this?

CASTIEL

It's no ordinary angel. Dean, this is bad. This is very bad.

ACT THREE

SCENE in the IMPALA near the BUS

CASTIEL and DEAN are in the Impala.

CASTIEL

On the battlefields of Heaven, there was a special class of angel, the Rit Zien. It's, uh, Enochian for "Hands of Mercy." They functioned like medics. They tended to the wounded. They healed those who could be healed, but for the mortally wounded, those who were past saving, the Rit Zien's job was to put them down.

DEAN

But the granulated bodies?

CASTIEL

This was their special ability. They had this way of smiting that was so quick and so total that it rendered death virtually painless.

DEAN

Yeah, but these aren't wounded angels that they're vaporizing, they're people.

CASTIEL

Right. I don't know. The Rit Zien home in on pain, it's like a beacon to them. So, when this angel fell to earth, he heard the victims' cries, and their anguish, same as he'd hear an angel's in heaven. He's continuing his heavenly work down here. One suffering human at a time.

DEAN

Yeah, but this last victim was not suffering. She was just a normal, moody kid.

CASTIEL

But he just got here. The ebb and flow of human emotion – Dean, I've been on earth for a few years, and I've only begun to grasp it. To him, pain is pain.

DEAN

So everybody's fair game?

CASTIEL nods.

DEAN

All right, well, we got to stop him.

CASTIEL

You have to stop him.

DEAN

You're scared.

CASTIEL

It's different now, Dean. Everything feels different.

DEAN

You're right. All right, I'll track down this, uh, Kevorkian wannabe, and I'll put him down.

CASTIEL (sighs)

Okay.

DEAN

You stay safe. Go on that date, all right? Go live a normal life.

CASTIEL

Okay.

DEAN starts the car. He looks over at CASTIEL, who hasn't moved and is still sitting in the passenger seat.

DEAN

Well?

CASTIEL

I need a ride.

DEAN nods, and smiles.

DEAN

Right.

He starts driving.

SCENE - Basement of the Bunker, Crowley.

SAM walks in again to CROWLEY's pen.

CROWLEY

I'll do it. But I want something in return.

SAM

Yeah, what's that?

CROWLEY

A telephone call.

SAM scoffs, shakes his head, turns to walk out the door again.

CROWLEY

Come on, Moose! Even Dahmer got one telephone call.

SCENE - Bunker, Sam & Kevin

SAM and KEVIN are caballing in a room, away from CROWLEY.

KEVIN

Seriously? You want to let Crowley communicate with Abaddon? A king and a power-mad knight of hell isn't enough for you? You want to throw a demonic team-up into the mix?

SAM

I don't think so. I mean, I – I don't trust Crowley, either. But I can't honestly see him working with Abaddon. He hates her too much.

KEVIN

You said it. You can't trust him.

SAM

We don't have to. Look, Crowley's bound. Ah, We can end the call whenever we want. Even if he wanted to give Abaddon information, he has none to give her. He doesn't even know where the bunker is.

KEVIN

He says he can decrypt the translation? What if he's lying?

SAM

You're right. We're gonna need proof.

SCENE - basement of the Bunker, Crowley

SAM shoves a piece of paper with some symbols towards CROWLEY.

SAM

What are these?

CROWLEY (teasing)

Ingredients.

SAM

More specific.

CROWLEY (shoves the paper back)

Ingredients … for a spell.

SAM shoves it back towards him again.

CROWLEY (sounds bored as he reads)

Heart of a Nephilim. Cupid's bow. Grace of an angel.

KEVIN hands CROWLEY a second piece of paper with a variety of other symbols.

KEVIN

And the rest of them.

CROWLEY

Phone call. You'll get the rest when I get paid. Now. Who's gonna be a dear and open up a vein?

SCENE. Nighttime, residential neighborhood

It's night. The IMPALA pulls up in front of a house, stops.

DEAN

Okay.

CASTIEL

Thanks, Dean.

CASTIEL starts to open the car door to get out.

DEAN

Cas. Wait. (DEAN sighs.) I can't let you do this.

CAS

What?

DEAN (eyeing CASTIEL's vest)

You're gonna wear that, on a date?

CASTIEL (looking down at his clothes)

This is all I have, Dean.

DEAN

Okay. Uh, lose the vest.

CASTIEL

What are you –

DEAN

Lose the vest, come on.

CASTIEL takes the vest off and hands it to DEAN, who tosses it into the back seat.

DEAN

That's a little better. All right. There we go. All right.

DEAN looks at CASTIEL appraisingly.

DEAN

And do the buttons – why don't you unbutton it?

CASTIEL starts unbuttoning his shirt.

DEAN

Okay. Th- that's far enough, Tony Manero. (DEAN laughs a little.) Um... (DEAN gives CASTIEL a once-over.) Yeah. Good. All right. Listen to me. Always open the door for her, okay? Ask a lot of questions. They like that. And, uh... Oh, if she says she's happy to go Dutch … she's lying. All right?

CASTIEL nods. DEAN slaps CASTIEL on the chest man-to-man style.

DEAN

Go get 'em, tiger.

CAS gets out of the car, and starts walking to the front gate. He turns around and looks nervously at DEAN, who gives him a thumbs up from the car. CAS returns the thumbs up geekily and opens the gate. He sighs nervously and walks to the front door, stopping to pick a rose from the front garden. After he stabs himself on a thorn, he whips out a pair of large clippers that he apparently carries on his person.

DEAN (watching)

Nice touch.

CAS partly turns back towards DEAN and waves him to leave. DEAN waves back, then, realizing that CAS wants him to leave, points to the road inquiringly, and then signals to say "OK, yeah, got it," and starts the car. But as he is about to pull out, he looks in frustration at a light brown Ford pick-up truck backing up toward him. (License plates IA H8101)

DEAN (regarding the driver of the truck)

What are you doing, jackass?

Dean (leaning out his open window and calling for the other driver's attention)

Hey!

DEAN waves to let the truck know he's there. The truck pulls forward a little, and DEAN pulls out of his parking spot and drives off.

The camera lingers for a moment on the pickup truck.

Back on the porch with CAS, NORA opens the door, putting her earrings on. She's wearing a dress and has her hair down.

NORA

Steve! I'm so glad you're here. (She smiles welcomingly.) Come in. I thought I was gonna be late!

CASTIEL steps in, with the rose held behind his back.

CASTIEL

Late for what?

NORA

My date! (It's becoming clear that CASTIEL is not her date.)

Bowling, would you believe it? But damned if I'm not dressing fancy, even for bowling. Haven't had an excuse to doll up since Tanya was born.

And there she is, my little angel. Now, she's already been fed. She'll probably sleep the whole time, and I'll only be gone a couple of hours. I just couldn't get my usual sitter, and I needed somebody here just in case she wakes up and starts crying. Which she won't, I promise. Baby Tanya never cries.

NORA walks briskly to the door.

NORA (continued)

Wish me luck. Oh, and thank you. You really are the best.

NORA steps out through the door for her date.

The camera zooms in on the rose that CASTIEL is still holding behind his back. He sets it on the counter and buttons up one of the buttons on his shirt.

CASTIEL

Babysitting.

Off-screen, Baby TANYA begins to cry.

CASTIEL sighs.

SCENE - Bunker

SAM unrolls a medical kit with five syringes. CROWLEY and KEVIN watch. SAM pulls one out and prepares to inject himself.

CROWLEY (making a negating sound)

Ah, bup-bup-bup.

SAM (stopping before he injects himself)

What?

CROWLEY

Not yours. His. (CROWLEY nods his head towards KEVIN.

SAM

What difference does it make?

CROWLEY

I've had yours. Stuck in here, you can't fault me for wanting a little variety.

KEVIN

No way!

CROWLEY

What's wrong, Short Round? Afraid of needles?

KEVIN

No, I just have a policy of not giving blood to anyone who's murdered my mother.

CROWLEY

I … have nothing … but time.

SAM

You're a dick. (Packs up the kit.)

CROWLEY

Good luck with that translation.

KEVIN, frustrated and angry, grabs the kit and a syringe. With CROWLEY watching, he sticks the needle deep in his left elbow, above a tattoo, and craws blood.

A few seconds later we see the blood being squirted into a metal dish. SAM looks angry.

CROWLEY (speaking Latin, one presumes)

Inferni sectatores, nunc audite regem.

The blood swirls, with mysterious noises.

CROWLEY is speaking to the bowl of blood, to the unseen demons on the other end of the "call":

This is Crowley. Connect me to— (pause) Crowley! (he repeats, annoyed)

(To SAM, who looks confused): Bad connection.

(To the bowl of blood): Crowley. Your king (emphatically). (pause) If you don't connect me to Abaddon right away, I will be forced to—

CROWLEY cuts off and pauses.

SAM

What? What happened?

CROWLEY

I've been placed on hold.

SCENE - Nora's house

Baby crying. CASTIEL walks in tentatively.

CASTIEL

Hello? Um... Please – please don't. Um … Okay. Oooo-kay, okay. (Picks up the baby.) How 'bout – how 'bout a lullaby? Um... Okay. Shh. Shh!

CASTIEL singing "Believe It or Not" (the theme from "The Greatest American Hero"):

♪ Look at what's happenin' to me ♪
♪ I can't believe it myself ♪
♪ suddenly I'm up on top of the world ♪
♪ it should've been somebody else ♪

The baby stops crying.

♪ oh, believe it or not ♪
♪ I'm walkin' on air ♪
♪ I never thought I would feel so free-e-e ♪
♪ flyin' away on a wing and a prayer ♪
♪ who could it be? ♪
♪ Believe it or not, it's just me ♪
♪ believe it or not, it's just me ♪

CASTIEL tries to put the baby down and she starts crying again. He picks her up again.

CASTIEL

Shhh. I know, I know.

SCENE - Impala, driving at night

DEAN is in the Impala, driving. His cell phone rings.

DEAN

Sheriff?

SHERIFF

Now, here's a wrinkle. Our first crime scene, married couple? Full analysis of the spray came in from the lab. Turns out it only contains the wife's DNA.

DEAN

The husband's still out there.

SCENE - Nora's house

CASTIEL is sitting in a chair with the baby, holding and rocking her.

CASTIEL (to the baby)

Nobody told you. Nobody explained. You're just … shoved out kicking and screaming into this human life, without any idea why any of it feels the way it feels, or why this confusion, which feels like it's … a hair's breadth (The baby stops crying.) from terror or pain. You know, just when you think you do understand, it'll turn out you're wrong. You didn't understand anything at all. Guess that's just how it is when you're new at this. You know, it wasn't that long ago when all I'd need to do to ease your pain was touch you.

CASTIEL touches the baby on her forehead.

CASTIEL (continued)

You're very warm. Is that normal?

Baby TANYA is crying again.

CASTIEL

Oh, shh. Shh. Shh. Shh.

SCENE - Interior; Sheriff and Dean

The SHERIFF and DEAN are looking at papers and talking.

SHERIFF

He was already a bit screwy, but then he found religion. She was a hard-line atheist, no peach herself, when he got himself obsessed with this Buddy Boyle whack job, an already bad marriage got worse. Kept telling her to "Let God in."

DEAN

Buddy Boyle. That explains it.

SHERIFF

Explains what?

DEAN

Never mind. Let's see. (looking at photos) Is that his truck? (remembering the truck that almost boxed him in at NORA's house)

SHERIFF

Yep.

DEAN

Cas ... (realizing the angel is heading for CAS)

SCENE - Nora's house

CASTIEL on phone, holding the baby

Nora, she's hot. She's really hot. Please just call – call me. Call – call back. If I don't hear back, I'm taking her to the hospital.

CAS hangs up. The baby continues to fuss, and he waits for a few seconds to see if the phone rings. He puts it in his pocket, and feels the baby's head again.

CASTIEL (worried)

Okay, Tanya, we're taking a little walk.

He walks toward the door with the baby, presumably to take her to the hospital. Reaching the door, he opens it – to reveal the Rit Zien angel.

ANGEL

Hello, Castiel.

ACT FOUR

SCENE - Nora's house

The ANGEL is wandering around NORA's house.

ANGEL

Squalid little dump. No wonder she cries.

CASTIEL is putting the baby into the crib. She's not crying at this moment, actually!

CASTIEL

It's a fever, Ephraim. It will pass.

ANGEL (EPHRAIM)

You remember my name? I was just a nobody when we met, but you – you were a legend. You've been here before. This is my first time, and it's ... intense.

CASTIEL

You know, there's a lot you don't understand about humanity at first. If you would just stop—

EPHRAIM

Stop? I won't stop … until I wash the planet clean of all suffering.

The baby starts fussing again. EPHRAIM steps towards her:

EPHRAIM

Allow me.

CASTIEL (standing in his way)

Don't. Touch. Her.

EPHRAIM

You think I came for her? No, Castiel. I came for you.

He moves around CASTIEL to the baby. CASTIEL appears stunned.

SCENE - Bunker basement, Crowley

SAM

How long's it take to transfer a demonic phone call?

CROWLEY

Can it, Moose.

KEVIN

Crowley, you got your call.

SAM

Yeah, it's time.

CROWLEY

It's time when I bloody well say it's time!

Suddenly the blood starts boiling and there are demonic sounds.

CROWLEY (to the bowl of blood)

Hello, Abaddon.

ABADDON

Crowley, how in the hell are you?

Abaddon is in an alley, holding a bloody knife, with a body of a young man near her, with its throat slit.

SCENE - Nora's house

EPHRAIM is talking, as villains are wont to do. While listening, CASTIEL runs his hand on the thorny rose he brought for Nora.

EPHRAIM

So much pain and despair, so many voices begging out for relief.

CASTIEL

How'd you find me?

EPHRAIM

Because you're warded? The same way I find all my patients – I just followed the sound of your pain. You have no idea how loud it is. I could hear you for miles.

CASTIEL is walking away from the baby's room; EPHRAIM is following.

CASTIEL

Do you really think you're doing Heaven's work down here?

EPHRAIM

I know I am.

CASTIEL

Well, you're wrong. Earth can be a hard place. But these humans, they can get better. They're just doing the best they can.

EPHRAIM

Is that what you think you're doing, Castiel – the best you can? Well, I'm sorry. But if this is the best that the famed Castiel can do, you're a more urgent case than I thought. I used to admire you. You failed more often than you succeeded. But at least you played big.

EPHRAIM looks down – and notices that CASTIEL is drawing a sigil on the door in his own blood. He grabs CASTIEL's hand before he completes the sigil, bending it sharply; there's a cracking sound and CASTIEL yells in pain. EPHRAIM shoves him away from the door, and still holding CASTIEL by the wrist, forces him to his knees, palm upward.

EPHRAIM

Now what are you doing? Burying your head in the sand. Right when your kind needs you the most.

EPHRAIM twists CASTIEL's wrist painfully and CASTIEL gasps.

SCENE - Bunker Basement, Crowley, and Abaddon in Alley

CROWLEY

And how are the numbers?

ABADDON

You mean souls? I've managed to double on your projections. Now, how did I ever pull off such a feat?

CROWLEY

You're taking souls before their time. Voiding my contracts!

ABADDON

That's right. I'm taking it all down, brick by brick. It's over. The days of Crowley, the king of bureaucrats – are done.

SCENE - Nora's house

EPHRAIM

Shh-shh-shhh. It'll be over soon. I'll take the pain away.

CASTIEL

I want to live.

EPHRAIM

But as what, Castiel? As an angel? or a man?

Crashing sound. DEAN rushes in, knife in hand. EPHRAIM gestures and DEAN goes flying into the corner.

BABY TANYA cries.

SCENE - Bunker Basement, Crowley, and Abaddon in Alley

CROWLEY is sputtering in fury.

CROWLEY

You... ganky... putrescent... skanger.

ABADDON laughs softly, amused by his name-calling.

CROWLEY (continues)

It may look like bean-counting to you, it may lack a certain adolescent flair, but my way... Works!

SAM lifts his eyebrows, and looks at KEVIN.

CROWLEY (continues)

You think you can control Hell with chaos alone, without the support of those who are still loyal to me?!

The blood in ABADDON's bowl is boiling creepily, looks like writhing worms.

ABADDON

No one's seen you in weeks, and last I saw you, Howdy and Doody had you tied up nice and tight. Seems to reason, they've turned you into a kennel dog. How does it feel, Crowley, to be the Winchesters' bitch? It's been fun indulging in your bluffs, but we both know you have no real authority left, no leverage. You have nothing to offer me. You have – nothing.

CROWLEY

Your way will backfire. You. Will. Burn.

ABADDON

I can't wait.

Their call over, CROWLEY pushes the bowl away. He looks like a beaten man.

SAM

Crowley?

CROWLEY

Bring me the translations. I keep my agreements.

KEVIN moves quickly to get the papers, then hands them to SAM who hands them to CROWLEY.

CROWLEY reads

"Obtain the ingredients – heart, bow, Grace." Blah, blah, blah. "Mix until the smoke shall rise from the ashes casting the angels from heaven." Blah, blah – Oh. Hm. It's irreversible.

SAM

What?

CROWLEY

This spell can't be undone. The new world order – we're stuck with it.

SCENE - Nora's house

DEAN is struggling to pull himself together.

EPHRAIM

You say you want to live. But you can't see what I see. By choosing a human life, you've already given up. You … chose … death.

EPHRAIM lifts a hand to CASTIEL's forehead.

DEAN slides the knife across the floor towards CASTIEL.

CASTIEL grabs it and stabs EPHRAIM. White light bursts out of EPHRAIM and he screams; DEAN ducks his head to shield his eyes from the blinding white light. A torrent of white light streams out of EPHRAIM's mouth as his scream continues. The body of the formerly-possessed, now-dead, husband falls to the floor.

DEAN pants. CASTIEL looks solemn.

ACT FIVE

SCENE - Sam (bunker) & Dean (Impala) on the phone

SAM is in the bunker, on the phone.

DEAN

Well, there's no way. Crowley's lying.

SAM

No, Dean, not this time. Look, Metatron built the spell to withstand any attempt to reverse it. There is no putting the angels back in Heaven. It's done.

DEAN looks nonplussed. He's leaning against the Impala.

SAM

Are you gonna tell Cas?

DEAN looks back towards NORA's house.

NORA and CASTIEL are leaving her house.

CASTIEL (awkwardly)

I'm, uh, sorry I overreacted. Um. My friend gave me a tip. A low dose of acetaminophen brought the fever right down.

NORA

Oh, that's okay. Date was a bust anyway. (pause; CASTIEL walks down the stairs) Steve? (CASTIEL stops and turns to look at her.) The part of you that overreacted, that cares so much? That's what makes you special.

NORA smiles at CASTIEL-as-STEVE sentimentally and turns to go back into her house as he goes out through the gate.

DEAN sees CASTIEL approaching.

DEAN (to SAM)

I got to go.

DEAN hangs up and turns to CASTIEL.

DEAN (to CASTIEL)

Where to, Cas?

CASTIEL looks at him, then gets into the car.

SCENE - Bunker, Sam & Crowley

SAM pours the bowl of blood into the sink.

He notices that the syringe kit is missing a syringe — there were five, now there's only four. He shuts the kit and leaves the room.

Peering in through the door into CROWLEY's den, we see CROWLEY has the syringe, and is apparently using it, although it's unclear for what. CROWLEY sinks back into his chair with a sigh.

SAM ducks back out of sight.

SCENE - Impala at the Gas'n'Sip, Dean & Castiel

The Impala pulls up to the Gas'n'Sip.

DEAN

Listen, Cas … Back at the bunker, I, uh... Sorry I told you to go. I know it's been hard on you, you know, on your own. Well, you're adapting. I'm proud of you.

CASTIEL

Thank you, Dean. (Sighs) But there's something Ephraim said. The angels — they need help. Can I really sit this out? Shouldn't I be searching for a way to get them home?

DEAN

Me and Sam will take care of the angels. You're human now. It's not your problem anymore.

CASTIEL gets out of the car, looks in through the window at DEAN, and they wave goodbye to each other. CASTIEL walks to the Gas'n'Sip and unlocks the door as DEAN starts up the Impala.

CASTIEL does the coffee, puts the cash drawer in the cash register. Turns on the TV:

TV NEWS ANNOUNCER

It's been weeks since the massive meteor storm, yet Idaho Falls astronomers still have unanswered questions. NASA and Washington are both continuing to study the phenomenon.

CASTIEL switches off the TV and goes to look out the window, moodily.

END.